Guilty of Unbidden Pleasure

Chapter 44

Blue's POV

Pinagmasdan ko si Bughaw na nakayakap sa bewang ko, payapang natutulog.

I closed my eyes as I know, tears are about to fall again...

Until now.. Everything feels surreal...

Is this a dream?

If it is, I'll trade anything wag lang akong magising...

Hindi ako makapaniwala...

Hearing the story, I should be angry and shouting and breaking but all I can do right now is to be thankful..

Thankful that my baby is still alive.. That Riel didn't intentionally left me. And that Benj is not a traitor...

I don't have the energy to argue anymore. I just wanted to embrace my child and...

To see Riel again.

I know it is unfair as I mourned for five long years and everyday was a battle. And that I didn't deserve everything tita Gemma did..

But I was so tired of hating. I don't have the energy to even think about it.

I just wanted to be with my family..

Family..

Tangina...

At last. A family of my own..

I kissed Bughaw's head and slowly went out of the bed...

Lumabas ako ng kwarto nila Levi..

I saw Benj looking at the balcony..

Nilapitan ko siya at tinabihan..

"Benj.."

"Hmmm?"

"Salamat."

I wanted to say a lot of things as he did the most sacrifice for me and Riel but that was all I was able to say..

Tumitig sakin si Benj...

I patted his back..

"Thank you. You did well. I will never forget this" I softly said

And with those words..

He cried like a child..

Parang isang batang nagsusumbong sa tatay..

Like a child validated..

Niyakap ko siya...

Humagugol siya ng malakas.

"I... I was so scared Blue.. I was scared.. Akala ko, hindi ko makakaya.. " he cried

Niyakap ko siya ng mahigpit....

"Sssshhh... You did well. I'm so proud ang thankful..."

Ilang minuto pa siyang umiyak.. Hanggang sa kumalma rin siya...

We were looking at the stars..

"He never intentionally left you.." biglang sabi niya..

I know..

And even if he will leave me, I will never blame him for that....

"Kamusta na siya?" Mahina kong tanong

"Ayun, mahal ka pa rin.."

Bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko...

"Eh ikaw Blue.. Matatanggap mo pa ba si Riel? Mahal mo pa ba siya?"

Hinintay niya ang sagot ko pero nakatingin lang ako sa langit..

Ilang minuto lang kaming tahimik hanggang sa sinabi niyang kailangan na nilang umuwi..

Nang palabas na siya ng balcony tinawag ko siya..

"Benj.."

"Oh?" Tanong niya, hawak na ang pinto sa balcony..

Humarap ako sa kanya.

"Hindi naman ako tumigil maghintay... Pakisabi, pwede na siyang umuwi..."