Life Is a Roller Coaster |Sequel|

08

After few hours of watching Netflix. I made lunch. Niall was of course first in a kitchen and all of the boys are eating now. And yeah I didn't eat breakfast and I don't eat now. And I'm not planning to eat today. Not probably next days. I ate really much when the Christmas was and I probably look like a ball right now. So no food. Thanks.

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Then because Niall was still hungry he decided to cook a sandwich for him. And because Harry is Harry he put Niall's sandwich into Louis' face. What the hell I'm doing here?? Please help me : ). Okay so Louis is angry, Niall's angry and I'm going to kill Harry. With my own fists.

Okay I think that something like prank war started right now. Because if you think that Louis and Niall will leave Harry alone. You are terribly wrong. I just need to watch to don't be too much close to Harry. Because it'd be horrible mistake for me.

So I decided to do some music. I really love to sing. I don't know if you know it but I really love it. And I wrote some song myself too.

I went to the music room and locked my door. It isn't that the boys don't know. But I'm really shy. It took really long time to start speaking again.

After that thing what I did. I had some girl psychologist. I had lot of them before. But my last one ended so I started to going to this girl.

She was worst psychologist ever. And it's really bad when I'm saying it because I experienced really bad ones.

Then I quit going to her. She wasn't helping with my speaking and everything. She just did it worse.

The psychologist what I have now. Is best psychologist what I ever had. And he's helping me a lot. Even with the things what I experienced long years ago. Just shortly with everything. He said that he is surprised that I spoke after what happened before. Because yeah it is traumatic I guess. But I think that the thing what I did the November before last one was the last thing.

When you did something what I did first time it's horrible. But when I did it second time...

It took a long time to make me better long time.

The emotions and everything. You feel like a failure. For me I was mad on myself too. Because it wasn't like the first time. I didn't want to do it. Like I wanted but I didn't think I'm going to do it. I didn't think at all. I just cut and cut... I felt really bad. And I was really bad on it. I had a low blood level and just. I was so close to my sister and mother.

I hurt everyone. And I made them cry. That's what I hate the most. When people cry. When they are sad and ai hate it even more because I'm the one who's responsible for it. I made myself cry. Again. I sat down on the floor and try hard to not be heard.

Now back to my psychologist. He is a guy. He isn't even that old. For me he's like a friend. And I truly believe him. He is a British. The first times we were talking on the internet. And I wrote him some important things there. I just didn't want any Czech again. And yeah. It was easier. Even if you could say that it was probably hard to explain in English but honestly. It was literally easier. And the guys were speaking with me in English everyday so...

He is amazing. And he helped me in not even year. More than the others for like ten years.

Now when I stopped crying. I standed up and sat to the piano. I learnt play the piano. Just the one year. My psychologist said that maybe it can help me do something what I like. And that's learning languages, traveling and playing the instruments. And just music. So I learnt on piano. Now I can play the piano, ukulele, recorder and little trumpet.

I wrote one song few days ago so I decided to play it. It sounds great. I like it. Then I started composing a new one. I hope I will do it that good like the first one.

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So next chapter. It's little more           about her so I hope you like it. Thank you for support. It means a lot for me. Please vote and comment if you like it. I love y'all                          and Byee<333