Changes

Chapter Eight

Amity

A little over two weeks went by in a blur as the date approached and now it was finally here. Today had been the anniversary of Edric's passing. I had awoken for the first time to an eerily quiet Blight Manor. No distant voice of my mother traveling up to stairs as she spoke on the phone. No sounds of my sister rushing around her room doing whatever it is that she did when she wasn't on the college campus. It had been a weekend meaning no school and no distractions from our current reality.

Emira, unlike how she had done every day, had walked into my room informing me that we were going to have a family dinner, before hugging me tight and leaving the room. It had already been late into the afternoon but I couldn't bring myself to leave my room, not today, not unless I had to. We only ate as a family on this day unlike we used to. His death had hung in the air heavily for the first year but this day felt like the weight of the entire world was placed over us every year after in the same way. A heavy, gripping, and unrelenting force that couldn't be contained nor controlled.

I had sluggishly dragged my feet to the dinner table where it had been set for five. Edric....they still set a plate out for Edric. I looked to see everyone already sitting at the table in still silence. "Amity dear, you can sit down." My mother said quietly, her voice taking on a tone softer than I ever remember it being except for on this day. It wasn't the quiet voice she uses when I've done something wrong and she wants to lecture me. I decided once again not to mention it and sat down next to Emira.

We all quietly ate, not looking at each other. Our eyes separately shifted to Edric's empty chair and untouched food. Back when we had family meals Edric would usually be the one who started the conversation, bringing life to the table with his light-hearted and joking mannerisms. Always telling us stories about some crazy thing that happened to him. Each of his stories becomes more unrealistic and unbelievable, yet funny nonetheless, making all of us laugh. He brought a light to the serious front our family name usually made us put up.

The tension was thick in the air until my father looked up with a smile I hadn't seen in a while. "What would Edric say? This room is too quiet! Now let me tell you about the time I wrestled a bear and won!" He started laughing and crying at the same time. I had never seen my father break down like this, but what he said brought light to the table that broke the tension completely. Everyone at the table burst out into full-blown laughter, all crying through the pain, and letting the walls down for once.

My heart soared at that moment. Happiness and belonging I never felt before with my family since we lost Edric growing in my heart and spreading throughout my being. We stayed there in the moment, at that table, and became a family again. I couldn't help but smile and secretly wish we could stay like this forever. It was selfish because I missed my brother, but I'm glad that even though he's gone, he is still here in spirit. My smile grew and I let myself have that moment, if only for a short while, and that is what we did. Sharing stories about Edric and letting ourselves remember him even through all the pain the memory of his loss put us through.

After the dinner, we all continued to share stories and allowed ourselves to fall into that light-hearted moment together while pushing everything else outside of it aside. It felt good to have that sort of environment. It was unusual but it was still nice in its unfamiliarity compared to recent times. The family went to their separate spaces in the house. I'm guessing we all needed our own space to process this day individually.

I had stood in the middle of my room, lost in my mind, as I lifted my head to stare at my ceiling. There were still some glow-in-the-dark stars that my brother and I hung up. I smiled at the thought. My brother may have been annoying at times, but he was a guy with a big heart and he cared deeply for all of us.