Tattered Souls

Chapter 37: TV

Paige

I can't take this anymore.

Being away from her has been hell.

Every time Jason brings up the wedding it makes me feel sick. I can't see myself with him.

When I look into the future, I see days where me and Sam just walk along the beach or go skiing or just laze around the house watching movies.

I remember way before we started getting intimate with each other how we used to be.

I used to stay over at her house almost every weekend because Jason would be traveling for work and have to spend the night at hotels a lot.

I would go over to Sam's and we'd just be us.

We would watch movies, play video games and just talk for hours.

We even used to sleep in the same bed all of the time.

She would wrap her arms around me and we'd sleep like that all night.

I loved feeling her so close to me but I didn't let my feelings show.

She was my best friend, I couldn't lose her.

One of morning, I woke up and she wasn't there. It was odd because she's not necessarily a morning person and for her to get up before me was rather strange.

I grabbed a shirt out of her drawer and went downstairs to find her.

When I rounded the corner into the kitchen I saw her standing over the stove cooking breakfast.

I leaned against the wall and watched as she gracefully moved around the room.

She's a great cook but shes so lazy that she doesn't do it very often.

I love to watch her in the kitchen because she seems so happy and at ease.

She turns around to grab something and freezes when she sees me.

"Aww man you were supposed to stay in bed." I laugh and she crosses her arms pouting.

"Now why would I do that? You would've had to carry everything upstairs." She shrugs and smiles a little.

"That's the point of breakfast in bed silly. I was trying to be nice. You are my guest after all."

I blushed pretty hard and turned away to cover my face.

She can be so darn cute and sweet sometimes but most of the time she's an asshole. 

It really drives me insane.

That's only one of the memories I cherish with her.

She always finds a way to surprise me and make me feel special.

These past few months have been nothing but bliss for me.

Growing closer together and being free to show our true emotions has meant the world to me.

After Jason proposed to me, I knew I could've said no.

I could have left right then and there but I froze.

Now she's moving on.

Moving farther and farther away from me.

I still love her. I still want to make more memories with her.

Seeing her talking to that girl racked me with jealousy.

I couldn't stand the sight of her smiling at another woman like that.

The way she used to smile at me.

She might think I'm being too forward but I don't care.

I wrap my arms around her as I continue to sob into her chest.

She's mine. I don't know how I'm going to fix this but I need her to smile at me again.

I look up once my sobs subside and she brushes a tear from my eye.

"Let's get you home hm?" I sniffle and nod as she helps me in the car.

The drive is silent.

I don't know what to say to her and she seems a bit uncomfortable around me.

I look out the window and look at her confused as we turn down my street. "Where are we going?"

She raises an eyebrow at me as we pull into my driveway. 

"I told you I was taking you home. This is where you live is it not?"

I bite my lip trying to suppress another crying spell.

In my mind we were going home.

To our home.

That's what her place feels like to me.

This place that we're at now feels so cold and empty, especially since I am here alone most of the time.

She gets out and opens my door for me.

I want to smile at the gesture but the memory of how she used to do that all the time pains me.

She walks me up to the door and I pause before turning the nob. "It's about to storm so I'm gonna head out."

She turns to leave and I reach for her grabbing onto her coat. "WAIT!" I shout a bit too loud startling her.

She looks at me a bit confused and turns back to face me. "Umm...don't you want to come in for a drink or something?"

She scratches the back of her neck looking away. "I'm not sure if that's a good idea."

I was about to respond when the bottom fell out of the sky and she sighs before opening the door and gesturing for me to go in first.

I blush a little and go inside.

She closes the door behind us and hangs up her coat. "Do you mind if I stay until the storm passes?"

I give her a look and shake my head.

"You know it's fine. It's not like your a stranger here." She nods and sits on the couch away from me.

I sit in the chair beside her and flip on the tv letting whatever is on the screen play. "Sorry for holding you up. I didn't expect it to hit so quickly."

She shrugs. "It's not like I have anything else going on at the moment."

 I nod and we watch the figures on the tv in silence.