🔞I May be Falling in Love // Hwang Hyunjin🔞

🖤Chapter 58🖤

I can't help but stare at the neatly packaged present resting on my lap as we sit in the car, silence closing in on both of us. It has a rectangle shape, almost like a book. I desperately want to open it, but I can't because whatever is inside this box has the potential to ruin my relationship with both Felix and Harley. I've lost Harley before, but I can't lose Felix now.

"When are you going to open his gift?" Cole questions, completely unaware of anything that has just occurred.

I don't respond, instead turning my gaze away from the present and stare out the window, admiring the shapes of certain snowflakes that the car has captured in the wind.

The car comes to a stop, and I realise we've arrived back at our apartment, wishing the drive had been a little longer.

"Cole?" I say softly just to grab his attention.

"Hmm?

"Do you think you can give me some alone time for a few hours?" I say, taking a deep breath before continuing, "I just need to be by myself for a bit."

Cole walks up to me, resting a hand on my shoulder. "Of course."

He smiles, assuring me that he will always be there for me. I return a genuine smile and walk into my bedroom, gently closing the door behind me.

I walk to my bed with the gift in my hands, sitting on the edge and observing the object. I take a deep breath before carefully removing the wrapping paper, moving as slowly as possible because I'm not sure what to expect. As the front cover of the journal comes into view, I feel anxiety creeping through my body and thoughts overwhelming my mind.

Taking the remainder of the wrapper off, I examine the journal's appearance; it's relatively new, with a leather brown cover. I open the cover with sweaty and shaky hands, reading the words 'Harley's Journal' on the first page.

Why would he hand over his journal to me? If he's trying to prove his love for me, his journal will not change any of his actions.

'Today, I met Audrey Scarlet; it was love at first sight, as if Aphrodite had sent an angel right in front of me. Her skin was delicately soft as our hands accidentally glided past one another's and her beaming smile took away any pain I have ever felt. 'I need to be with her.'

I felt my heart flutter as I read the kind and beautiful words in his journal, which made me cry a little knowing he threw it all away. I closed the book and went to put it away, but something told me to keep reading until the end. I reopened the book, turned the page, and resumed reading.

'I felt myself becoming increasingly attached to her beautiful soul, and I didn't want to take my gaze away from her for even a second. Finn took her away from me last night and ruined her pure soul. I'll never forget the terror and pain I saw in her eyes when Cole took her away. If I had the chance, I would have killed Finn. I wanted him dead, but I knew it was wrong, especially for Audrey, who was my top priority.'

I let more tears flow at a rapid rate as I let out whimpers, clutching the journal tightly as the events of that night flashed back through my mind. Harley was the one who got me through it and made me realise I was in love with him.

I hate that I don't necessarily feel regret for what happened to me with Finn; I will always despise his guts for what he did, but he was the one who brought me and Harley closer together. I wanted to be with Harley all the time, not wanting to leave his side as he helped me through my mental pain.

I read some more; all of his passages were about our times together, with little about himself, his family, or his friends. His words grew more meaningful as he wrote about the most insignificant things we did together that I barely remember. My mind and heart were both perplexed; if he meant everything he wrote, then why? Why would he throw everything away? Why?

'I made a major mistake. I had lost her. Everything was taken from me. I should have just given them the money so they could leave my life alone. Audrey is the only person in this world I care about, and they took her away as well. I made a bad deal with some people in order to clear my name and have a good future as a teacher with no records of being in prison, abusing alcohol, or engaging in physical fights. To have that bright future, I had to pay some money to a gang I went to prison with and promised to give them the money as soon as I got out. Of course, I didn't, but my name was cleared and the gang remained imprisoned. Unfortunately, it came and bit me in the ass because I lost her. I told all my friends about the deal, so they made sure I was happy while I was with Audrey, even though Cole thought it was wrong not to tell her anything.'

So many thoughts are clouding my mind, no idea what to think. Felix saw him with someone else, this is the doing of a deal, he willingly chose to cheat on me.

'I heard a knock on my door that morning, thinking it was Felix, who said he was swinging by, but when I opened the doors, I was met with the same gang I arranged the deal with, as well as a petite blonde who tagged along with them. Before I could slam the door in their faces, they pushed right past me, causing me to fall to the floor.. All of the men pinned me against the floor, yelling at me to pay them the money I owed, which, of course, I didn't have lying around. They threatened to hurt Felix when he arrived, and there was no way I was going to let them hurt the vulnerable boy, so I asked to pay them back in another way. They waited until Felix arrived before pushing the blonde skank onto me and demanding that I kiss and undress her...'

After reading the last sentence, I immediately closed the book, tears wetting the pages and smudging the pen ink under each tear droplet. 'How come he didn't just tell me everything?' I questioned myself, resentful that he was forced to do that. Why didn't Felix or any of Harley's friends inform me that he was being abused in this manner?

I could feel rage coursing through my veins. Anger directed at everyone except Harley.

I need to see Harley.