Denial of the Whisper

Chapter Five.

Chapter Five.

It was the first time that I saw real shock flash his face.

Caaln had himself under control quite fast again, but I had noticed it.

"You told me your name."

"I didn't, and we both know it. Don't lie to me.", I said, anger filling my voice.

He stayed silent, so I continued, a little bit more silent. "You already have my freedom. Please, at least be honest about what awaits me."

He seemed to study me for some time, then he stated "You are afraid."

Averting my eyes, I fumbled with my fingers.

A heavy sigh escaped him. "Adriyele. It is not on me to tell you. That is not my task."

Huffing, I raised my eyes. "Your task is to bring me there, right?"

His jaw clenched, but he didn't nod, nor did he shake his head in denial.
"I just don't understand why. Why me? I am not a real Rhaayl. I could understand it if I had any healing magic, but I have none. Why the burden to travel that far just to get me?"

My eyes must have begged him for an answer, as I looked at him.

But Caaln's face went to stone, again, not even giving me any hint.

Again, I tried "I am useless as a healer. And once, whoever you are bringing me to, realises this, I am as good as dead. You could have just left me there, facing the wolf instead. Maybe, that would have been a better death. Maybe, that would have been mercy."

And for the first time since I had that nightmare of my dying mother, tears fell.

The unknown was killing me.

It slowly was.

This whole situation, it frightened me. Ripped out of my home, my life, and now completely at Caaln's mercy. Or, on whoever's mercy who gave him orders. On whoever's mercy, whose task it was to tell me what was in store for me.

If I at least knew why all of this happened, I could at least try to brace myself. But I simply had no idea.

And for me, that was an unbearable feeling.

Taking a shaky breath, I shoved the food to the side, draped my blanket over my body and curled into a little ball.

I slept restless that night, waking up every few hours – or even minutes – just to toss around, trying to find a better position to sleep in. On the other side of the small campfire, Caaln sat, his eyes trained on me the whole time, but even when I woke after another nightmare, he didn't speak with me.

When I woke up another time, he nodded and got up, indicating that we were going to leave.

Somehow, my heart sank at that.

Without another word, he packed our stuff while I got ready, trampled on the remnants of the fire and waited till I got up the horse.

I could handle silence.
But this, this tenseness, it bothered me. It brought me on edge. I've never had something like that before. My mother always spoke with me. She had no reason not to. And... afterwards, there was no one constantly around. Surely, the villagers didn't treat me as one of their own, but they've not been around constantly. Not like Caaln for the past days.
Caaln didn't speak with me the following hours, and my panic got more severe, slowly feeling like a lamb being brought to the slaughter.

We've gotten out of the forest hours ago, and the sun was burning down on us now mercilessly, as we rode upon an open field.

The dark woods around us had gotten lighter with every hour, and around midday we ascended a larger hill, the horse carrying us closer to the border of the High Ilryn territory with every steady step.