Back to normality?

Chapter 75

As the following few days went by, Carla arranged to take time out of the Bistro as well so Peter wouldn't be alone with his urges and temptations; but by Saturday night, he was climbing the wall with needing to escape from the flat. As much as Carla wished she could trust him, she couldn't but equally, being midway through her pregnancy, she was exhausted; settling Matilda in bed, she left the nursery, quietly closing the door, to find Peter putting his jacket on.

"Why don't we have an early night love?" She suggested.

"I need to get out, go for a walk"

"I've put Tilly down now" she tried to reason back to him. "And Simon isn't here to keep a listen out"

"I'll be okay. I won't try anything stupid"

"Please love, just stay here with me" she pleaded.

"Please Carla, I need to get out before I go insane. It isn't helping..." he responded, making his way to the door. "I'm sorry" he whispered before leaving the flat.

Sighing, she sat heavily on the sofa and let the tears fall; she wished she could've stopped him from going or could've gone after him but she was physically and mentally exhausted. Hearing a soft knock on the door, she wiped her eyes and opened it; seeing it was Michelle, she didn't even try to hide how she was feeling as she let her in and shut the door behind her.

"Are you okay? You've been quiet the last couple of days" she questioned as she made them a drink.

"I'm just tired," she said, trying to sound strong, even though she knew Michelle would see right through the facade.

"And Peter? Where is he?" She asked, handing a mug of tea over as they sat at the dining table.

"Out; said he needed fresh air" she sighed.

"How's he doing? Any more attempts at having a drink?"

"I've been watching him like a hawk; we haven't been out anywhere and there's no alcohol in the flat anyway but out there...I can't stop him" she answered, her voice breaking.

"Oh Car, you don't need to do this alone," she said, resting a hand upon hers. "Maybe it's time to tell Ken what's going on?"

"I can't; Peter's adamant that he can get through it. He doesn't want to disappoint him again..."

"That doesn't mean you have to take all the responsibility of helping him; look at what happened to Peter when he tried to do that with you"

"I'll be okay" she insisted, rubbing her eyes. "I just need him back here where I can see him"

"Want me to get Tom to go and find him?" She offered.

"I really want to trust him but...I don't know if I can" she cried, finally giving in to the tears again.

Michelle quickly put her mug down and crouched at the side of Carla's chair, pulling her into an awkward hug.

"You're exhausted which isn't helping either; why don't you go and have a bath and leave Peter to me, eh?" She suggested, running her fingers through her friend's long hair.

"Not until I know where he is" she shook her head as she felt her phone vibrate in her jacket pocket. "It's him...Peter, where are you? Okay, but you haven't...? Come home, please, we need you here. I love you too"

She sniffed and hung up, placing the phone on the table as Michelle retook her seat.

"Where is he?" Michelle asked.

"Sat in Peace Gardens, contemplating going into the new shop that's opened up but he phoned me instead"

"That's good, that he reached out first, isn't it?"

"He's trying, maybe we can get through this" she replied, taking a sip of her lukewarm drink. "Can you keep a listen out for Tilly while I go to him?"

"Go on, take as long as you need"

"Thank you"

Grabbing her jacket and keys, she made her way over to the Gardens where she found Peter exactly where he said he would be.

"Hey, you," she said softly, sitting next to him. "I'm proud of you, for calling me first"

"I don't want to relapse Carla, I don't," he said, slowly turning his head to look at her.

"I know you don't and the fact you've been so tempted and so close to doing so but haven't, that proves it"

"I'm sorry, for walking out on you; I needed to get out of the flat"

"I know, keeping you cooped up probably wasn't helping," she said as his arm came around her shoulder to bring her closer to him.

"It was. I'm sorry for causing you all this stress this week; you were right the other day. This should be a happy time, looking forward to having our baby..." he said, a hand resting on her bump.

"We'll get there, together" she smiled, leaning in to kiss him. "What was it you used to say to me? Having a bad day doesn't mean you're going backwards or relapsing; we just have to remember that applies to you too"

Resting her head on his shoulder, they sat there for a few minutes in silence before Carla let out a loud yawn.

"Let's go home love" he smiled, taking her hand.

An hour later, with Michelle back at her own flat next door and Matilda still asleep, they were settled in the bed; Carla had her head resting on his shoulder and her hand on his chest as his hand stayed firmly on her growing belly.