Phobia

4. The Salvation

I was all alone. Invisible to the masses, kept like a secret in the house. The vast, desolate house. It was like a prison. I had no one - no one to stay beside me and no one to save me from sin. I was the lone wolf. Then she came along. Venus.
She was alone too, but together, we weren't lonely anymore. We were perfect for each other. We fitted together like two pieces of a puzzle. It was like fate brought us together.
Alas, like a bright star, she only glimmered in the sky of my life for a short period of time. Abruptly, she vanished.
She may have vanished from the world, but she certainly didn't vanish from heart. I never forgot her. A breeze came into my house and blew her away like the last bit of warmth, and my heart grew cold once more.
I knew somewhere deep down. I knew she didn't run away. She was out there, waiting to catch a glimpse of me. So I searched. I searched the corners of the world. I searched everywhere.
But I always came back empty- handed. My precious Venus.
Nowhere to be found.
I was on another one of my trips when I saw a flash of auburn. It was her! I cried out her name and rushed towards the alley where I saw her. "Venus! I'm finally here, Venus! Come to me!" I cried till my voice turned hoarse. Yet she didn't come.
As the light of day dwindled, anxiety gave way to soul - crushing despair. No matter what I did, she wouldn't come. I sat down in the dusty alley and cried my heart out.
Venus.... She was really gone. My delusions fled as I stared at the harsh reality.
I was so preoccupied with my sorrow, I didn't notice someone creeping up to me until it was too late. A knife was pointed at my throat as I looked up, my vision clouded as the attacker became visible.
Venus! I couldn't believe my eyes. " Venus? Is that really you? Don't you remember me? I finally found you." The tears came out again, but this time with immense joy. Miracles do happen. My star, my salvation, she was - "Who the hell are you? And why have you been searching for me?" Venus scowled and pierced the knife through my skin. As I raised my hand to my throat, it came back coated in red. My Venus... she didn't remember me? Why?
The girl who I spent so much to mourn, the one I gave up so much for, she didn't know me?
Realisation dawned on me as the pain brought clarity. Memories revealed.... that 'Venus' was just a figment of a lonely girl's imagination. She never existed. The Venus in front of me, she wasn't my Venus. My Venus never was real.
'Venus', seeing me sob pathetically, rolled her eyes and ended my misery. As my life drained out of my body, I understood.
I lived alone, I died alone. I was all alone.
With my blood on my hands.