When All The Lights Go Out

Chapter 5

The night is peaceful and quiet, the only sound that can be heard from outside is the sound of a few cars passing by. Emma turns around the bed as she tries her best to go to sleep but she can't. She opens her eyes with a sigh, yet another night she can't have a peaceful sleep. She gets up as she quietly goes to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. As she fills quietly the glass, she glances at the clock. 4am. Emma sighs as she curses having insomnia at times like this. She stays by the counter as she looks into nothing, letting her thoughts take control. She stays like this for a little while, then places the glass in the sink as quiet as possible and retutns to her room.

As she closes the door quietly, in order to not wake Heeseung up, she goes back to her bed and lays down, staring at the ceiling. She tries her best to sleep, knowing she needs to get up early in the morning and she only has a few hours left. But she can't. Thoughts are battling inside her head, all the doubts she has for herself strike back, she feels lost. She feels she is not good enough for anything, not good enough for anyone. She lets her emotions take the best of her and she can feel her eyes watering. She feels so overwhelmed that she can't help but burst into tears, all the pain of her past comes back to her and she doesn't know how to deal with it. Emma takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself down in order to get some good sleep. She wipes her tears, as she closes her eyes, trying to relax as much as possible, finally falling asleep after a few minutes.

As morning comes Emma wakes up at around 6, as she lets out a relieved sigh that she managed to sleep properly at least for a few hours. She gets out of bed, as she goes to the bathroom to wash her face and do her daily morning routine and then goes back to her room, as she starts getting dressed. She recalls her breakdown last night as she sighs and quietly leaves the room to go and prepare breakfast. As she goes downstairs to the kitchen, she finds Heeseung already there scrolling through his phone. "Good morning" he says as soon as she notices her, smiling. "Good morning. Have you eaten already?" Emma asks as she goes to make herself some coffee. "Not yet, I just woke up to be honest" Hesseung says his smile never leaving his face. "Oh, ok uhm wait until I make breakfast then, I will be quick" she says as she goes to the fridge but Heeseung stops her as she turns to look at him. "Are you ok? Your eyes are red, have you been crying?" he says looking at her with concern. Emma stays there not knowing what to say, since she doesn't want to worry him. "No, I just didn't sleep very well last night, don't worry" she forces a smile as Heeseung relactungly lets it go. "Ok... But if something's bothering you, please tell me right away ok?" Emma nods at that as she continues to make the breakfast. "Of course, come on now sit down" she says with a smile as she continues making some pancakes.

Heeseung looks at her quietly as she continues to cook, wondering if she is really ok. But he doesn't think much of it, not wanting to pressure her in order to tell him. "Here you go" Emma says as she serves him a plate of pancakes snd then sits down as well. "Enjoy" she says as she takes a bite, while handing Heeseung the syrup. "Thank you very much. What about you, aren't you going to eat?* Heeseung asks as she shakes her head with a smile. "I don't usually eat in the morning, it kinda gives me an upset stomach for the rest of the day, so I avoid it" Emma explains as Heeseung nods understandingly. After breakfast, Emma cleans both the table and the dishes as Heeseung stays with her. He keeps thinking about why she was crying earlier, try to find the reason behind it but at the same time he does not know if it's a good idea to ask her about it. "I am working til late tonight so I won't be home all day. Are you gonna be ok by yourself?" Heeseung asks her as he sits up, taking his jacket. She turns around to face him, as she continues washing. "Yeah I am gonna be alright don't wor-AH!" she says as she realizes she cut her hand while washing a knife. "Fuck, are you ok?" Hesseung rushes by her side panicking. "Let me see it" he says as he gently takes her hand to see the wound.

Emma looks at him the whole time, her eyes never leaving him. "Let me get the first aid kit, wait here" he says as he rushes out of the kitchen to his room. He comes back almost immidiately as she takes her hand gently and starts treating the wound. "Does it hurt?" he says while looking at her. Emma shakes her head reassuringly. "No" she says she watches him carefully placing a band aid on it. "There. Run it under some warm water, it should be fine in a couple of days" Heeseung says as Emma nods, thanking him. "You should go, don't be late at work. I'll be fine i promise" she says as she watches him looking unsure. "I am gonna be ok, don't worry" she says again, making him smile. "Alright. I'll be back at noon but you have to promise me that if anything happens, you are gonna call me right away, got it?" Heeseung says as he goes to the door. "I promise I will. Have a nice day at work!" Emma says as she waves at him, watching him go off with his car.

As she closes the door, she leans back closing her eyes. She takes a deep breath as she goes to the living room. Hopefully she doesn't have to clean so much, since Heeseung is the complete opposite of being messy. So, she decides to go upstairs to see what is waiting for her there. As she goes to Heeseung's room first, she opens the windows letting the air enter the room as she starts fixing the messy bed. She first cleans the entire room and when she finishes she goes to the other rooms to find something to do. After cleaning almost every room in the house she goes downstairs and lets herself fall to the couch. She takes a look at her treated wound from earlier as she smiles remembering Heeseung's care. She then glances at her phone to check what time it is. It's almost 12, so Emma goes to the kitchen to see what she can cook since she got hungry and Heeseung is gonna return late. She finds some leftovers from the ramen yesterday in the fridge and some fresh vegetables. She decides she'll make a salad first since its easier, still being careful as she still has a wounded hand. After making the salad, she searches the upper cupboards for ingredients, wondering about what she should cook. She then sighs as she closes the cupboards, as she decides to eat the ramen from yesterday.

After eating, she washes everything and goes to her room to lay down on the bed. She doesn't know what to do since she has finished all the chores around the house. She then grabs her phone and decides to call mrs Lee. After a few rings, she hears a familiar voice. "Hello?" "Hi mrs Lee. It's me, Emma" emma says with a smile on her face. "My dear, how are you? I know it's only been a week but I've missed having you around" mrs Lee says as Emma giggles. "I've missed you too. How are things going? Is everything ok?" Emma asks, remembering that the shelter was about to close. "Oh well, unfortunately we lost the shelter. I reallly couldn't keep it open, but I got a refund from the bank and things are going pretty well for now. What about you, how's your job going?" mrs Lee says, remembering the last conversation they had. "I am sorry to hear that. I know how much you loved it there. But actually, I am doing great. Everthing is going smoothly and the man I work for is very kind. I really like him, we get along well" Emma says as she smiles at the thought of Heeseung. "I am so happy for you my child. You really deserve the best" mrs Lee says. They continue talking as Emma tells her all about her new life with Heeseung, leaving aside the part she has a crush on him. "Happy to speak with you again Emma. Call me anytime ok?" mrs Lee then says as Emma says her goodbyes and they end the call.

Emma tears up a bit, feeling good to talk to mrs Lee after leaving. She is the only person who stood by her side at her worst times and Emma is grateful for their friendship. She makes herself a promise to visit her as soon as she can stand properly on her feet again, hoping it will be sooner than she expects. Having nothing else to do, Emma goes to her room, closing the door behind her as she lays down on her bed immediately falling asleep.