When All The Lights Go Out

Chapter 16

Emma looks at Heeseung who looks back at her without even blinking. Before she tells him everything, Emma hopes she doesn't lose control as she tells him her story. She takes a deep breath, as she finally decides to speak.

"So, it all started a couple of years back when I lost my parents. I was living with them in a small house outside of Seoul. Losing them was a big shock for me, I was depressed for months after that. You may thinking, didn't she have someone by her side at that time? Well, I thought I had but I was wrong" Emma says as she laughs sarcastically, remembering the events. "I was in a relationship back then, his name was Zayn. We were together for 2 years and a half. He knew about my parents because I had told him about their funeral. When that day came, he called me and said that something urgent came up at work and he couldn't make it. I understood him, since he worked in his father's company. My dad knew his dad and that's how we met at the first place. So, after the funeral I went to his house since I had nobody else at that time. And I caught him cheating on me" Emma stops as tears starts falling from her eyes. Heeseung notices how overwhelmed she is as he takes her hand softly, giving her some courage to continue.

"I froze. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I don't even remember what I did, I started yelling like a maniac, throwing things on the floor, at him, everyhting I could find. I left and took a cab but I didn't go home. It reminded me of them. So, I went to the nearby shelter and that's where I found mrs Lee, the owner. After I told her everything in tears, she offered me a place to stay and since I didn't have any other options I said yes. And I never went back in the house. It reminded me of so many bad things. I was depressed for almost a year, at a point when I refused to leave my room. I would stay in bed all day crying, I wasn't eating well. I even had suicide thoughts. But I never had the futs to do anything crazy. And that's where the panic attacks started, like the ones you have witnessed since now. I had nightmares almost every night, in a point where I couldn't sleep without a light on or someone with me. Mrs Lee, tried to get me through therapy but nothing worked. I was really messed up for a while. With time, I got over it somehow, in a point where I also had some peaceful nights without anyhting waking me up. But I think I still have so much anger inside of me, for trusting the wrong person, for loving the wrong person, that I came to a point where I didn't want to be in love ever again. And now here I am. Battling with depression and trying to live a normal life away from drama and toxic people" Emma says as she wipes her tears.

Heeseung looks at her speecheless. He had no clue about any of these, especially her being suicidal. He can't even process the thought of Emma hurting herself. He wastes no time in pulling her in for a big hug as Emma lets herself go, as she cries. "Shhh, it's ok Emma. You are with me now, you are ok. I am not gonna let anyone hurt you, I promise. You are ok" Heeseung whispers soft words to her as he strokes her hair lightly. They stay like this for a while, 'til she seems to calm down a bit. As they break the hug they stay like this staring at each other. "I am gonna take some days off in order to help you. I know I put a lot on your shoulders I don't want you to stress more, ok?" Heeseung says as Emma tries to argue but she knows she has no chance of winning against him.

"Thank you"