A Healthy Obsession

The Letter

It's Tuesday, 4 days since I found out I was pregnant. Brandon has yet to call back or text. At 8:30 I got a notification from Brandon, but not the one I was hoping for.

BrandonTheLover is streaming! Quick stream, explaining the break!

Oh. My. Fuck.

So he can stream on Twitch but not send a damn text message? I told Arny we shouldn't just mail the positive test to his PO Box because he'll probably just think it's fan mail. But dammit, now I wish I had sent it via FedEx or something.

I opened the Twitch app and watched as the viewers quickly streamed in. He began calling out his hellos to the first few people.

I debated sending in chat. "Hey Brandon. It's you know who. Call me." But that probably wouldn't go over very well.

Arny has been nothing but kind and supportive since we found out. His sex drive is lower than normal, however I think that's due to me feeling sick and him not wanting me to feel bad about it.

"Ok, so, as you may know I had taken a short...long break from streaming and posting. It's mostly due to personal reasons which I am not going to share. But some feelings have come up in my own life and I can't just talk about it online as of right now. I'll try to post on TikTok when I can, but YouTube and streaming is on hold."

Chat erupted with questions and speculations.
What about your Pateron?
What do you mean feelings?
Does Brandon have a girlfriend?!
It's ok Brandino, take any time you need. Your mental health is important to us too.
Will you still be on Pateron?

"Ok, so for the Pateron! Whatever you paid and did for this coming month is on hold. I'll do a refund for my Pateron. But I'm just going on a little vacation. I'll still be messaging back on Pateron if you'd like, but no new content for this month and going forward. I'm sorry about all this, but thank you guys for being understanding and supportive."

He answered a few more questions. Well... he dodged a few more questions and then ended the stream.

I watched the stream from start to finish, just sitting in shock.
So he has time to stream but not answer a damn phone call?

I rewatched the short stream, hoping he let something slip about what exactly he's planning. I watched it a total of 4 times, but after ever rewind, still nothing stood out. He said nothing suspicious or hinting.

Hell, maybe he knocked up another girl.

That thought left a sour taste in my mouth.

"I'm mailing him a damn test." I mutter to myself.

I go to the pharmacy and pick up a new test, one that will clearly says "Pregnant" or "not pregnant".
I buy the test, and 3 more, just in case. In case of what? I have no clue, but just in case.

I take the test at the pharmacy, and head to the post office. I grab a card to go with the package.

The card said, Congrats baby! Pink or blue a dream come true!
I laughed at the card, because this still feels like a nightmare for me.
I write more on the inside.
There's a 50/50 chance you're a dad. Call Arny if your heart can grow a size or two. We need to talk.

I smile at the reference to the classic Christmas movie. I don't sign the card, he should know who it is. I put it all together, and send it off.

I dust my hands off and resolve to get some ice cream before going home.