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𝐊𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐝𝐚𝐦, 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟐
Juniper woke well before dawn. As usual, her first conscious thought was of parem, and as usual, she had no appetite. The ache for the drug had nearly driven her mad last night.
Trying to use her power when getting a free flight back to Ketterdam had left her desperate for parem, and she'd spent the long hours tossing and turning, digging bloody half-moons into her palms.
She felt wretched this morning, and yet a sense of purpose made it easier to rise from her bed. The need for parem had dimmed something in her, and sometimes Juniper was afraid that whatever spark had gone out would never return.
But today, though her bones hurt and her skin felt dry and her mouth tasted like an oven that needed cleaning, she felt hopeful.
Even as Jesper held her hair back, careful as to not touch her skin as she vomited everything that was in her stomach, a spark of hope was still lighting itself in her heart.
The pair sat on her bathroom floor, the cool tiles pressing against their skin as they stared at opposite sides of the wall. "I'm gonna miss you," He spoke quietly.
Her eyes didn't meet his. "I'm gonna miss you, too, Jes."
He grinned, "I thought nicknames were for losers?"
She looked up at him. "Speak about this to anyone and I'll cut off your finger... Jes."
His smile didn't falter, instead, it only grew. "I knew you liked me. It was only a matter of time until you admitted it."
Juniper rolled her eyes but even so, he noticed the way her lip twitched upwards in the slightest.
"Are you really sure we can't visit you? I can use my excellent skills in fashion and disguise us as pigeons?"
She shook her head though the small smile never left her lips. "You can't go anywhere near Hellgate, Jesper. It's too dangerous. They know your face. They know Inej's face. Even Matthias'. It's too much of a risk for you to be there."
Jesper nodded slowly. She could tell he didn't like the answer she gave him. Her boot-covered toe nudged his. "We'll find a way. I know we will."
She had one day left. One last day of freedom until god knows when.
"I'm sorry we couldn't get him back. I know you wanted to see him before you went back."
Juniper shrugged. "What're a few more years? It's nothing I haven't dealt with before."
A knock sounded from the door and Jesper quietly let them in. Matthias and Inej joined them on the floor, Matthias next to Juniper, a safe foot away while Inej sat close to Jesper.
They sat in comfortable silence, basking in the time they had left with their boss. No, not their boss. Their sister.
Matthias' fingers inched towards hers, just barely touching her as Inej and Jesper's feet nudged against her boots. Just enough touch not to bring back the harsh water but enough to tell her she was not alone.
