Do you love me? (A 1D fanfic)

Ch. 31

4 months later:

My mind was reeling. I had completely lost control over my life. I'd fallen in love, and lost him, again, and now I was silently crying, eating ice cream, and watching The Notebook. I had received texts and voicemails, but I wasn't ready to reply. Then, the texting stopped, and soon the voicemails followed. I wiped my eyes with the last tissue I had. Suddenly, a knock sounded on the door. "Coming." I paused the movie, and hid all of the tissues. Zayn stood in the doorway. "Hey." He stared at his feet. "What do you need?" I sighed, stepping to the left so he could come inside . "Nothing. I just want to talk." He looked around my house, seeing all of my shit thrown everywhere. He reached up to my face and wiped my tears with his thumb. "Why are you crying? Did somebody hurt you?" He demanded, and I looked up at him. "Please don't cry." He whispered, and I shook my head. "I'm not crying." And he rolled his eyes. "Yes you are." With that, I began to sob, collapsing on the couch and continuing to watch the movie. "I want you to tell me the truth." Zayn sat next to me, and pulled out the five empty tissue boxes. "Why are you so upset?" I leaned against his shoulder and blew my nose. "You." I smiled weakly at him, and he bit his lip. Tears welled in his eyes as well. "I don't want you to feel like I hate you, because I can't. No matter how hard I try." I closed my eyes. "It's been four months." He handed me another tissue. "Lets start brand new. A clean slate." He blinked, and I nodded. "I love you." I blurted, and instantly regretted it. He sighed, and held my hand. "I have a girlfriend." He murmured, not meeting my eyes. I nodded. "I get it." My lower lip trembled, and Zayn studied my tear-streaked face. "Can we still be friends?" He asked quietly, and I shook my head. "I want to, but I just can't." Zayn pulled me closer to him, and we sat there in silence. "I'm calling her. I can't see you like this." Before I could stop him, he dialed Alison's number. "Stop." I frowned at him, and he chuckled. "Hey...Alison, listen. I really miss Lexi. So, I don't think we're gonna work out. It never made sense anyways." He hung up before she could reply. My eyes widened, and he smiled down at me. "I have to say, I can't believe you want to be my girlfriend after how horrible I've been in the past few years." He murmured, and I laughed. "Your flaws are what make me love you even more." Zayn blushed. "I've missed you so much." He smiled his dazzling smile. "Promise you won't be mean anymore?" I asked, and he nodded. "I promise you."

"Hey!" I opened the door to see Victoria, Harry, Amelia, Bella, Niall, and Louis grinning at me. "We missed you!" Amelia hugged me. I couldn't stop smiling. "We're going to Florida. And you're coming with us." She stated, still grinning. "That sounds nice." I replied, just as Zayn appeared behind me. "Did you know about this?" I asked him, and he nodded. "I did it for you." He was trying to gain my trust by buying things for me. I accepted it anyways, trying not to sweat the small things. We all crowded in Zayn's brand new house. I stared at the white tiles in the kitchen, remembering I had picked them out. Everything in this house reminded me of us. I quietly roamed his bedroom, only to find used tissues and dirty underwear. I stared at pictures that hung on the walls, and saw one of me. I let tears fill my eyes, and quickly wiped them away when I heard footsteps. "Lexi?" Zayn showed up behind me in the mirror. "Sorry, I was-" I turned around and he kissed my cheek. "Stop." I saw his shocked expression. "I'm sorry I screwed things up." He said apologetically, and I shook my head. "No, it's my fault." I shouldered past him, and sat back in the living room with everybody else. "Are you okay?" Harry whispered in my ear, and I nodded. "Fine." I lied. A lot of lying goes on to cover up the truth.