Imperfection

f o u r t e e n

we didn't make out
or do anything
I just remember
I was all over her

_______________________

Today was the day. I never really had problems to fall asleep, more with the staying asleep. I woke up at 4:30am that day, 4 hours before my alarm would go off. Knowing my body and also, feeling absolutely awake, I didn't waste my time in trying to fall back asleep. I got out of my bed, took some new bed sheets out of my wardrobe and made the bed for Jill and I. Germans were weird there, they mostly had blankets for just one person, so when two people slept in one bed, they didn't share a blanket. It for sure kept some problems away, but it still was weird.

I didn't want to wake Georgia up already, so I put on some clothes and made my way outside. It had been weeks since the last time I went out running in the morning, it always used to be the reason I woke up so early. But here, in Munich, I fell into the routine of Georgia and the others. Don't get me wrong, I liked it, but it felt good to do the thing that always brought me inner peace. Normally, at every other time of the day, I hated it, but in the morning running felt like therapy. I loved the cool air that still smelt so fresh, like it had never been touched before. The whole city was calm, empty, peaceful and just beautiful. I soon stopped in a park, looking down from a hill and onto a small sea, ducks swimming in it. It reminded me of the evening after the funfair with Jill, the thought of her immediately making me smile. I couldn't wait to spend more time with her. Laying down on the grass, I closed my eyes, and without me wanting to, I fell asleep.

I woke up through my phone ringing, groggily grabbing it and looking at the screen, I saw that Georgia was calling. And seeing that the time was 8:45am, I knew she must've just woken up.

G🌻 is calling...

,,Aurie?", she asked, confusion in her voice.

,,Yes, don't worry. I woke up early and went for a run.", I smiled, already knowing what she was about to say.

,,Ahh, okay!"

,,I'll go back now, give me 10 minutes."

,,Okayy, I'll tell the girls we'll just grab breakfast then."

The call ended and I made my way back home, the park only being a 15 minutes walk away so I soon arrived back home. The others were sitting in front of the house, waiting for me and enjoying the sun of early March. The days had gotten longer and also warmer, the sun shining almost every day. I quickly got ready and filled my water bottle, before joining the others outside. We got our breakfast from Ursel, but she quickly ushered us out again, telling us that we'd miss training if we'd stay any longer. In the care, we had light conversion just as always, all of them laughing at me when I told them about sleeping in the park. We soon arrived at the campus though, getting into the building and then outside to the pitch, training in the warm sun of Munich.

Three hours later I was standing at the airport once again, waiting for the blonde girl that made my heart flutter. I was excited, but also nervous. I didn't know where we were standing, what we were, just that I liked her. And I wanted her to know. She made me feel things I have never felt before, even though I wouldn't describe it as those butterflies everyone always talked about. She made my heart skip a beat and go in double pace after, she made me smile like an idiot at my phone when she made a joke over the phone to cheer me up, she made me laugh and feel comforted. I felt comfortable around her. I had never been in a relationship before, I didn't know how things worked and maybe, maybe I was a little naive as well, but the situation I found myself in with her, with Jill, it made me feel buzzing from excitement and could bring me joy in moments of total numbness. I loved every second of it and when I saw her turn around that corner, her typical smile playing on her lips and looking just like I remembered her, I couldn't help but grin brightly. I quickly walked in her direction, my steps getting faster and faster as I soon started jogging and when I had finally reached her, I let myself fall into embrace. I felt her arms wrap around my waste as I wrapped mine around her neck, standing on tiptoes since she was definitely taller than me. She squeezed me closer and I could make out her chest pressed against me. We soon broke away though, both smiling brightly before we made our way out to Georgia's car as I had borrowed it. We had light conversion, excitedly talking about our lives even though we were constantly catching up over phone, it felt so natural with her, like we would've done it multiple times before, me picking her up before happily catching up. I couldn't wipe the smile from my face, couldn't help noticing how this was better than anything I had imagined before. I know that was stupid in a way, but normal.