what's out there ( a poetry story )

down my spine

time

time keeps ticking

and

you still run
my mind

heavy on you
but
weak knowing you may never come back

i can't wrap my head around it

what if i lost something i didn't know was worth fighting for?

but
you didn't fight either

i'll never understand
how someone can just leave and not care about the trauma it will cause them

i don't understand how you can just rip me apart
piece
by
piece

and just throw me away?

your face
your smile
your voice

it lingers down my spine

i called it love for so long,

but what if it was just a lesson i never learnt?

what if this was something that needed to happen to shape me into who i am today?

because i'm not liking who i am right now