Nico di Angelo One-shots

No Man's Land

This is a very different kind of one-shot than normal. It is angst, but I'm changing some foundations to Nico's character.
In this one-shot, Nico di Angelo is Native American (Anishinaabe). It becomes difficult for him to connect with his boyfriend, Will, who is white.

Nico took a deep breath. He held Will's hand as they watched the movie. Like many Hollywood movies, there was slight racism involved. A white man in Native regalia and a joke about Thanksgiving was involved in this movie. It was a comedy, so he tried to look the other way, but Will had seen this movie before and Nico had always asked Will to let him know ahead of time if there's racism because he likes to mentally prepare.

Nico doesn't like to admit it, but he's a sensitive person. Not in the sense where racism in movies actually bothers him individually, but in the sense where it's exhausting to not care. It's exhausting to not care because it's pushed in his face so much, and even his boyfriend can't keep his promise about warning him about it. It's exhausting to not care, but it still affect his community. It's exhausting for it to not bother him personally, but it's still the tiresome, same old tale told over and over that would've bothered him as a child. It's just a reminder that in 500 years of genocide, things are still the same, just less people are aware of it.

Nico squeezed Will's hand as Will mindlessly watched the rest of the movie. Nico tried to put it out of his mind, but now it was more than just the movie. It was the fact that Will does this all the time. Never considers Nico's boundaries about these type of things because they're just so normalized. All Nico wanted was a heads up, because if he's enjoying a movie, he wants to actually enjoy it. If he can expect elements of racism, guillotine humor or dark humor, than he can forget about it. But if he doesn't expect it, and he's already in a bad mood when starting the movie... it just doesn't work that way.

Nico had told Will many times to give a heads up, and now Nico is angry.

At the end of the movie, Will looks to Nico, "So? How'd you like it?"

Nico clenched his jaw, "Yeah. It was fine."

It actually wasn't bad, just he couldn't get these thoughts out of his head. Did Will just not care? How many times would he have to bring it up to Will for Will to actually consider Nico when it comes to the little things like this? The little things matter to Nico.

Nico took a deep breath. But he couldn't tell his boyfriend this, could he? Because he's pale. And that means, no one - even his own community - actually sees him as Native. Yeah, they hear him when he shares parts of his culture or his background. Yeah, they listen when he says he identifies that way. But push comes to shove, people don't look at him and go "Native American, obviously." No matter how many times he tells them. No matter what.

So does he even have the right to say it bothers him when Will does this? Everybody does it. And nobody cares.

He doesn't belong with white people - He'll walk into a room of all white people and everyone just knows he doesn't belong. They know there's something different about him.

But he'll post online or go to a powwow, and everyone smiles at him for "being such a good ally" and "learning about their culture." He doesn't belong there either.

No side sees him. No side claims him. He belongs on no man's land. There is no ancestral tie he can claim and no racial role he can fit perfectly.

He looks down, still holding Will's hand. Will would never have to worry about this. Even with his dark tan, and his blonde curly hair that he dyes brown every once in a while. He can fit into any box he wants and somebody, somewhere would accept him, whether it be right or wrong.

He exhaled sadly. He was tired of this.

"We should get some sleep," he announced, glancing up at Will.

Will nodded, yawning absent-mindedly. "Yeah, I'm tired. Love you, sunshine." But how can you love someone you don't truly see? You choose not to know, to misunderstand?

Nico smiled lightly, trying to push his thoughts away, "Love you too, babe."

Thanks to @Julian2788 for requesting angst!