The Lunatic Fringe and The Sexy Psycho (COMPLETED)

Job Interview

Waking up shuffling around with my head filling from the nightmares of that night.

"No!" Screaming at the top of my lungs as the letter falls out of hand. Crashing into the floor following with my body while I spill my tears. "He can't be dead!" Saying to myself as the tears continue to drown me in the river. He can't be dead repeating to myself in my head while having my hands cover my face. Tears just spilling out of my like an open wound that doesn't stop bleeding. "Jamie." Whispering into the drowning river with my heart devouring itself. Ripping into pieces shredding on the floor into a billion pieces. Having my heart literally tear apart from it's veins while trying to still pump blood through it. Pounding my fist into the floor repeating to punch it over and over. Crunching of my fingers making my knuckles bleed mixing into my tears. "Jamie just can't be dead." Telling myself slowly trying to recover my breathing from it's really fast pace. Please no not a panic attack right now... No.... Fuck. My breathing going out of control as I continue to try and keep it slow. Not working with me with it continuing to go at a very rapid pace. Suddenly my body movements not working as it starts to jerk around and twitching without command.

He wasn't gone for long when the war started... then he just died. At least that's what the letter said. They only found his dog tags. It's been two years but I still dream about him time from time. Only his picture haunts me through my phone. Jamie was a wrestling fan as well I think that's why I'm so addicted to it now. It helps me mourn him in a way. I know that's one of the reasons I want to be a wrestler so bad. For him I want to be able to be the Diva Champion like we always joked about. Dedicate my wrestling career to him knowing he's watching me somehow still. At least I hope he is.

Getting out of bed walking over to my closet. Opening the doors open dramatically before walking in and turning on the light. Looking for a perfect interview outfit before just deciding in something casual. Digging through some clothes before finding my perfect outfit, my favorite outfit. Changing into the plaid red short sleeve shirt, dark navy blue skinny jeans, charcoal black combat boots, and a Roman Reigns jacket with his logo on the back. This is causally professional right? Yeah... It is... Or at least I think it is. I mean I could always take off the jacket before I get there or right after I get there anyways. I guess it just depends if it's cold or not plus I'll be keeping my jacket unzipped. That way she can see I at least tried to dress up, not really, for this interview.

Turning off the light walking out my closet going over to my phone. Unplugging it from the charger and unlocking it checking for any missed calls or texts. None, of course. Tapping on the message app going to the new message icon and tapping on that as well. Scrolling down to Lana's name tapping on it sending her a quick thank you message again for all of this.

Me: Hey Lana baby :p I hope everything is going well. Oh and thanks again for everything it really means a lot. You've always been here for me and I can't ever thank you enough for that. Russev got himself a lucky lady don't ever let him treat you wrong beautiful <3!

Quickly rereading it before tapping the send button and locking my phone. Pushing it into my pocket while walking over to the kitchen to grab some left over of my dinner for some breakfast. Like always doing what I do best grabbing the leftovers putting them into the microwave then die slowly waiting for them to be done heating up. These things don't take long but it does take enough time for me to start thinking about my dreams from that night before or last night. Then I always get stuck in my head for a bit and I really don't want to think about Jamie right now. I've done enough mourning but I still only feel pain when I think about him. I need to be happy when I go to meet Mrs.McMahon later for the interview. I need to be able to bring my A game.

Sighing eating my lonely breakfast putting on some music from my phone to try and fill the silence. Luckily for me I learned the trick of the louder the music is the harder it is for your mind to think of all the bad thoughts. But today playing it low in my headphones just day dreaming of what it would be like if I won the Diva Championship.