Heaven's On Fire |Dimebag Darrell

It Has Only Ever Been You PART 1

November 10th, 2004

  I was weak. It only took 15 days till I finally broke. Missing Darrell was an understatement. The domestic life was nice at first, I had plenty of things to fill my time and with no obligations. 'But it was how the house was quiet without Darrell that drove me insane. Nights were lonely without him wrapping me up in his arms. I missed his chaos. I had no one waking up in the morning with me to ask what my dream was about. Rita had to "move" in to help keep me sane, but it only helped so much till I knew I just needed Darrell.

  Hearing Darrell's laughter from the other end of the phone helped lighten the dismay that I was met with. I was complaining in how I reorganized our home for the 5th time. "Sounds to me like you are a bored housewife." I knew he was teasing me and rightfully so. Thankfully he was pretty consistent when it came to his phone calls. They were something I looked forward to. "Yeah, I guess so. I didn't know how silent our home was till you left. I don't like it at all," I explained the challenge I was facing. I could hear some background noise the moment Darrell went quiet. They were about to go on stage tonight, but Darrell wanted to hear my voice beforehand. I loved that he didn't care in showing me that I was on his mind.

  Hard to hear with all the commotion going on, but I could hear Darrell speaking with someone. "Why don't you and Rita start packing. You two have a flight to catch in a few hours. I will have a car sent to the house," Darrell spoke. Confused, I frowned even though I knew he couldn't see me. "Wait, what do you mean?"

  "Well, I miss you baby. So, I have a flight scheduled here in a few hours. I will meet you over in California. I will make sure to be picking you up myself." Wait, so I was going to see him? "'But what about everything here?" I dared to ask. I truly wanted to see him. I could only hope that he wouldn't change his mind. "They can wait a little bit longer. Not like anything is happening right now anyways," he explained. This was true, things with Dean guitars were going slow. I couldn't hold back my smile any longer. I could no longer hold back my excitement, squealing into the phone. Darrell laughed. "I take it that you are happy then?" Even though he already knew the answer, he wanted me to solidify for him. "Hell yeah you did! I am going to start packing now. I will see you in the morning!" I rushed a quick I love you before hanging up.

  Rita was in the living room when I rushed in with the news. I knew Rita was missing Lenny very much. I could see she was trying to not complain about it as much, but she too was feeling the effects like I was. When I shared the news, Rita was jumping with excitement. Packing didn't take us long due to how excited we were. I mean we had two hours to spare.

  Luckily, we were able to fine entertainment in one of Rita's lame drama shows till the doorbell rang. That must've been the driver that Darrell spoke about. When I opened the door, it was easily confirmed. Handing the driver two suitcases, I ran back inside and made sure that everything was locked up. Including the front gate when we finally drove off. Experiences had showed me that you could never be too careful.

  We checked in the moment we reached the Dallas airport, seeing that Darrell had placed us in first class. I couldn't help but reflect on my life. We came along way from sitting in economy to now sitting in first class. The times of never having enough money to barely stay a night in a hotel, traveling across Europe in a piece of shit RV. Now we were staying at the finest hotels wherever we go, eating at the best restaurants. Darrell made sure to spoil us while we were out on the road, but he never allowed the paper in his pocket to determine who he was as a person. I have personally seen him take the money out of his own wallet and give it to fans during a show, telling them to go grab a beer on him. That's just who he was. Darrell always gave his all, and never expected anything in return.

  Boarding was at 2:15 in the morning, and it was only 1:45 right now. Taking in the scenery, I realized that I was sitting at an all too familiar gate. "This is where I actually met Darrell for the first time," having it dawn on me as I continued to look around me. Rita looked up from the magazine she was reading, brows knotted in confusion. So, I further explained. "Back in 91', when they decided to allow me to join their tour to Europe. The painkillers tour. I sat right there, and Darrell literally crashed into my life. The rest was history I guess," I pointed to a char that sat just adjacent to where we were now. Rita looked over at the space, I am sure she was picturing how that must've looked. "Crazy how time flew," she mentioned. I couldn't agree more. 13 years I have known those guys.