Breakthrough

Easy Like Sunday Morning

After making sure Tommy and Gail had everything they needed for the night Blake and I headed upstairs. I laid on my side of the bed and pulled the comforter nearly up to my chin while Blake went to get changed into pajamas and brush his teeth.

"You ok?" He asked coming out of the bathroom.
"Yeah," I replied.
"You don't look ok," Blake said sinking into the mattress and turning on his side.
"I'm just thinking."
"About what?"
"Just what you said about Wilson."
"What about him?"
"It just made me realize that I don't have my best friend here anymore."
"I've never even heard you talk about your best friend," Blake said scratching his chest.
"Because I've just gotten used to the fact that she isn't around."
"Is she dead...too?" Blake asked cautiously.
"No! My mom just chased her off. She always told me that she wasn't good enough. Her family wasn't good enough. She wasn't the kind of girl that I should be hanging around. And she said that stuff in front of her and she just told me that it may be easier that we weren't friends. We did everything together. And we promised each other that our kids would grow up together and being pregnant and Courtney not being here just made me realize I miss her. I've missed her for a long time," I said sniffling as Blake ran his long fingers over my hand. He swiped his thumb but under my eye to wipe tears on my face. He didn't say anything. He didn't need to. I just wanted someone to listen.

I woke up the next morning snuggled into Blake's rising chest and his hand pressed into my back. I looked up at a sleeping Blake and rested my head back onto his chest.
"You awake?" He asked.
"Yeah. Did I wake you up?"
"No," he said rolling onto is back with his had still wrapped around me.
"I think I'm gonna go look for a crib today with your mom."
"Yeah? I think she'll like that."
"Yeah, what time is it? Maybe we can go to breakfast too," I said rolling over and looking at my phone on the nightstand. The clock read 8:46 am. I didn't even know if she was awake yet.
"Where are you gonna go?"
"I wanna go to Pottery Barn Kids. They have cute stuff. I guess we want what like white? You mostly have white interior."
"Whatever you want Soph."
"Are we gonna be living here? I mean the baby and I," I said looking up at Blake.
"Of course. Sophie, did you really think I would kick you out or something?"
"I don't know. I mean no, I don't think you'd kick is out. But, this is your place and I have my own down the street. Would you be more comfortable if the baby and I lived at my house?"
"No, I'd feel more comfortable if both of you lived here. I want to be here for everything and I can't have that with you living down the street. And there is plenty of space here. There is the bedroom right across the hall that can be the baby's room and the loft down stairs that we can be a playroom. We can have everything here."
"Ok."
"Ok? Is that it?" Blake asked.
"I don't know, I guess. I guess I just expected you to want something else."
"I just want you here. The both of you," Blake said as his large hand grazed the top of my belly. I smiled at him and ran my hand over his stubbly face.
"I need to get up and see if your mom wants to go," I said sitting up and stretching my arms.

I saw that the guest bedroom door was open and I heard the TV down stairs. I saw Gail sitting on the couch next to watching the Today Show while Tommy leafed through a newspaper.
"Good morning," I said at the bottom of the staircase.
"Good morning!" Tommy said.
"Morning, sweetie," Gail said smiling.
"Did you guys sleeps ok?" I asked as I sat in one of the chairs.
"Yes, just fine," Gail said.
"Good. Well I wanted to see if you wanted to get breakfast and then do a little baby shopping with me?"
"Of course! That sounds great," Gail said excitedly.
"Ok, you wanna leave in let's say an hour or so?"
"Sounds good."

After getting ready, Gail and I decided on a little diner called Grinders to have breakfast.
"Do you have any cravings yet?" She asked as she skimmed the front page of the menu.
"No, not yet. But I'm sure I'll have them eventually," I said taking a sip of my water. I'd try to cut out coffee completely unless I absolutely felt that I needed it.
"When I was pregnant with Blake, I was always craving popcorn. But not like microwave popcorn, it was like the movie theatre popcorn. Oh my god. I cannot tell you how many times Tommy just went to the theatre to buy that for me. It had to be hot too," Gail said giggling.
"That's so funny because Blake loves that kind of popcorn. I remember one of our first dates was dinner and a movie and he told me I just can't go to the movies and not get popcorn."
"Yep, that's my Blake," Gail said smiling.

After breakfast, Gail and I headed to look at cribs at Pottery Barn. When we walked in we were greeted by a young woman that told us of the sales going on.
"Were you guys looking for anything special today?" The woman asked.
"Yes, a crib," I said to her.
"Ok, come right this way and I can show you the ones we have. Now, are you looking for a specific color?"
"Preferably a white one."
"Ok, well here are the ones that we have and I know some of these are brown and black but they all do come in white as well. if you have any questions please let me know," she said walking away.
"Ok, thank you," I said to the employee.
"This one is nice," Gail said pointing to the white wooden crib.
"I like that one too. It's just so big. Does it look big to you?" I said touching one of the railings.
"Yeah, it's a bigger crib. Did you want a smaller one?"
"I don't know. It's just I'm thinking of putting something this small in something that big. Maybe I do want something smaller."
"Maybe you should look into a bassinet. You know like the little basket type cribs. That way you could have it in your room. Really right next to the bed."
"Yeah, that sounds better. I mean I didn't want to have the baby in a room by itself yet either."
"Then why don't you get both. So you have the bassinet for when the baby is first born and then the crib for when it gets a little older," Gail suggested.
"Ok, yeah. That sounds good. I'm glad you came with me. I feel kinda clueless," I said laughing.
"Hey, that's what grandmas and moms are for."
"Thank you," I said smiling.
"Mhmm. You know I'll be here. Always."
"I think that's what I need."
"I know. And I'm happy to do it," Gail said wrapping her arms around me.

At that moment is never felt more like a daughter before. I'd never felt a love like that before. At that moment I told myself that I'd never be the kind of mother my mother was. I couldn't. I just couldn't.

Happy Tuesday! I feel like I haven't written in forever. How did you guys like this update?! I know not much happened...Do you guys want to meet Claire soon? Also were just one or two chapters away from knowing if baby Griffin is a boy or girl! Remember to vote and please comment! I love hearing what you guys have to say! Thank you for all the reads...almost to 32k!