on the edge // hyunlix

8 ; beads of blood

There was the long awaited knock.

Hyunjin walked in as Felix called out that it was purely alright to do so.

His reaction was inevitably as imagined, Hyunjin exhaled gently before rushing over to Felix, who sat there with an ashamed look.

"Why would you do this?" Hyunjin whispered, grabbing Felix's arm and tracing his finger lightly over the few scars that didn't stop bleeding right up until now.

He was so careful with it, so soft.

It was shocking for Felix to know how considerate someone could actually be. It never occurred to him that anyone could be this gentle, specifically in such a matter.

"I wanted to feel relief, and I saw Jae-Hyo again." Felix admitted, watching how Hyunjin looked so concerned about his wounds.

"Did he do anything to you?" Hyunjin paused, grabbing tissue as a starter to treat the scars. "Or did he say anything?"

"Well- no." Felix spoke hesitantly.

"Is that a lie?" Hyunjin questioned, walking back to Felix and crouching before him, grabbing his arm carefully.

"...No." Felix whispered, looking down at Hyunjin.

"Are you sure?" Hyunjin whispered back, wiping the blood lightly.

Felix didn't respond. He didn't want to tell Hyunjin the truth. He knows he should, though.

He's almost too certain that Hyunjin will help and comfort him as if his life is on the line.

"He did something to you." Hyunjin stated gently, he seemed so sure about it;

Was he there when they met?

Even after how Felix declined his kind offer of taking him back home?

Maybe it was only a guess, a lucky one, because for sure, he got that correct.

Felix shook his head, still – for some reason – wanting to hide the truth.

"Why do you keep denying?" Hyunjin sighed, stopping his actions and looking up at Felix.

"I know he's done something to you. There's no other reason for you harming yourself this bad except him." Hyunjin uttered, looking at how Felix avoided his eyes.

Hyunjin chuckled lightly, "He's told you to jump again, hasn't he?" Hyunjin inquired ever so softly.

Felix's reaction was confirmable to that. He let out even the airiest small groan that Hyunjin still heard.

"Please, don't do things like this just because Jae-Hyo tells you something. He'll take it too much for granted." Hyunjin explained, as his voice cracked for a very small while.

"But, even if it's not about him, I can't stop." Felix whimpered.

It only seemed that the longer he spent with Hyunjin by his side, the more sensitive secrets he let out, secrets that even Jeongin didn't seem to know.

"I want to help you through this, Felix." Hyunjin replied, pausing as he stopped wiping the blood, "I don't want you to go straight to harming yourself. I want you to call me, text me, when you're feeling like this."

"I can't. That's wasting your time. This isn't important." Felix insisted, not wanting to make it such a big deal but probably making it an even bigger deal.

"Why do you reckon your safety isn't important? It's not wasting my time whatsoever." Hyunjin whispered, looking up at Felix, who looked almost as if he was going to break down.

"I don't feel the need to call it important. It's not necessary for you to be responsible for me, too." Felix sighed, explaining his single reasoning.

Hyunjin didn't reply. He didn't bother touching up on such a topic, especially at this moment.

Felix also left it be, anyway. An argument won't be supposedly efficient.

Hyunjin took a few plasters out of his coat pocket, putting them on Felix's arms that were covered with a range of red lines;

He put plasters on the ones that still had minimum beads of blood.

He looked so concentrated on it with his mouth agape only slightly.

"I'm done." Hyunjin uttered, rolling the blonde's sleeve back down.

Felix did still manage to let out a faint 'thank you', caught even as it was raining outside – the rain pounding on the windows, still sounding comforting either way.

It was just about to be the crack of dawn, yet Felix and Hyunjin were both sitting here with little to no sleep.

"I'm interested in why you actually came. I didn't expect you to. It's too early." Felix hummed, awaiting an answer as Hyunjin sat up on the sofa beside Felix.

"You called me, and I've told you I'll be available anytime for you." Hyunjin replied.

"Didn't I interrupt your sleep?" Felix questioned with curiosity lacing his speech.

"You did, but that doesn't matter at all. I wouldn't like to imagine your state if I haven't picked up." Hyunjin hummed lightly, displaying the pure concern of other outcomes, "I'll be honest – even this is slightly worrying me." He whispered, referring to Felix's arms.

"But I've said not to be worried..." Felix mumbled, barely caught by Hyunjin.

He didn't reply to that anyway. Even if he tells Felix that he 'isn't' concerned, he will be either way.

"You should sleep." Hyunjin advised, standing up.

Felix still wasn't certain about why Hyunjin cared for him so much already.

Yeah, he's explained he's had similar problems to Felix's, but surely, they weren't that bad.

"I'm not even tired!" Felix exclaimed as if he was a child complaining about wanting to stay up late.

"I'm sure you've been worried this whole time. Besides, not sleeping for extended periods of time is bad for you." Hyunjin explained, extending his hand out for Felix.

Felix took hold of Hyunjin's hand and stood up, Hyunjin leading them to where he thought Felix's room was.

"That's the bathroom." Felix gently uttered, giggling right after.

"Oh, where's your bedroom?" Hyunjin laughed, following where Felix pointed which was the room before – Felix just didn't stop and tell him.

"Here, then" Hyunjin hummed, sitting Felix down on his bed.

"I'm not going to sleep right now. I need to change too." Felix spoke, shaking his head.

"Why do your clothes even matter? Your hair was messy earlier on when I came so I trust you've slept a small bit before calling me – Your clothes certainly didn't matter then." Hyunjin questioned, reminding himself slightly of the blonde's appearance earlier on.

"That's true but it's uncomfortable..." Felix muttered, standing up and taking out appropriate night clothes from his closet.

Sooner or later he was done dressing up and sat back down.

"I'll go then, goodnight." Hyunjin smiled, walking away but Felix grabbed his wrist, stopping him completely as he turned around.

"Stay. Atleast until I fall asleep, please." Felix whispered, looking at Hyunjin so endearingly.