Lizzies starting filming filming today which is very exciting and I'm going to Scarlett's ultrasound with her because she insistedi came if I was alright too. Lizzies coming with me and then on the way home I'll make a slight detour and drop her off at the airport so she can catch her plane.
"Hey baby, are you ready to go?" Lizzie asks wrapping her arms around my waist from behind "nearly" I tell her applying my makeup and lipstick "why are looking so pretty today? Trying to impress the ultrasound tech" she teases "ha ha very funny" I roll my eyes and put the lipstick down "now I'm ready". Lizzies arms unwrap from around me and she hands me my knitted white wooden jumper Scarlett got me for Christmas this year "come on babe" she takes my hand and we go straight to the car after locking up the house.
Lizzie drives us to the hospital and I grab my handbag from the backseat "you coming?" I ask turning to her "no, Scarlett doesn't want loads of people there" "come on, she won't mind. I promise" Lizzie nods with a small smile and gets out the car.
She walks to the front and holds my hand "just ask her first" she whispers in my ear as we walk in. We look around and finally see Scarlett in the corner on her phone "there you are" she says about to get up from the chair "you stay down there pregnant woman" I smile but she gets up anyway "they'll call me in a minute. Thank you for coming, I missed you so much" she says squeezing me tightly "I missed you too. How have you been?" I ask letting her go "the same as before. How was Ibiza?" I look at Lizzie who smirks "lots of sex I take it" Scarlett says making me blush "maybe but moving on from that, Ibiza was brilliant and the sand was super soft and the water was beautiful. We took a day and went to see a waterfall more inland from the resort which was really pretty" I share 'good, I'm glad you had a nice time".
Lizzie hits my elbows my arm "oh. Lizzie wanted me to ask if it's okay for her to come. I'm dropping her off at the airport on the way back" "yeah of course it is, why wouldn't it be?" Lizzie smiles softly and sits down next to Scarlett 'so how far along are you? When am I going to start seeing signs?" I ask and Scarlett laughs "maybe like two months and a bit. I'm not that pregnant yet!".
The nurse calls Scarlett into a room on the right so we follow her in. "Good morning miss Johansson" the main doctor greets "good morning but please call Scarlett" the doctor nods and looks at me and Lizzie "these are my supporters" Scarlett laughs "no, their my family. She's y/n who's my sister and her partner Lizzie". My heart goes all warm and fuzzy at the sound of Scarlett calling me her sister, we've never told someone that we are sisters only friends. The doctor smiles at us "nice to meet both of you and you Scarlett of course. I need to fill in a form but we'll get straight to it" she nods.
Lizzie sits on a sofa whilst I stand next to Scarlett. The doctor starts smearing fell over to probe and Scarlett smiles up at me "okay?' I nod and give a warm smile. He starts moving the wand around on her stomach and points at the screen "there you are" the three of us look at it's and I hold Scarlett s hand "seven weeks" the doctor says and Scarlett smiles widely "my baby" she whispers reaching for the screen "yeah. That's your baby" I smile. Scarlett looks up at me "your goddaughter" I smile and kneel down next to her "remember to be girl" I whisper and poke the top of her stomach.
"is everything okay? Are they the right size?" Scarlett asks and I look up at the doctor and hold her hand "everything looks perfect" he smiles and I squeeze Scarlett s hand. I look back at Lizzie who's watching me with a smile before turning back to Scarlett "it better be a girl" I tell them all rather seriously "it's too early to tell yet" the doctor chuckles "I know" he looks up at me "do you have any?".
With that my smile fades and I feel all the colour in my face disappear. I stare at the full cupboard on the wall Infront of me but get snapped out of my thoughts when I feel Scarlett s hand squeeze mine "I um...excuse me". I leave the room and go back into a corridor, taking deep breaths to calm myself. In...and out. In...and out. That's what Lizzies taught me which is what she got from her therapist. The door opens making me jump "hey" Lizzie whispers and hugs me tightly "it's hard" I say into her shoulder "I know it is. I could never know what your thinking but I'm here, I'm always going to be here y/n". I look up into her eyes "I know" Lizzie smiles softly and holds my cheeks in her palms "you've got so far baby. Before you didn't want to talk about it".
I watch Scarlett comes out the room over Lizzie's shoulder so I pull away from her and walk over to Scarlett. "I'm sorry. When he asked I-i just couldn't" she smiles softly and moves a strand of hair out of my face "Its okay, I understand how hard this is for you and I'm just grateful you came" Scarlett shares "...did you get the photo you wanted?" She nods excitedly and takes it out of her handbag to show me. "Doesn't look anything like a baby but it's still kinda cute I guess" she grabs it from me "don't be so mean to your niece". When she says that a massive smile grows on both our faces "maybe your mum should adopt me" we both laugh "she should and then she'd end up with an even number of kids".
We leave the hospital and arrive at the airport "so I guess this is that" I tell Lizzie whos looking out the window "yeah" she whispers and looks at me. She holds my hand and smiles softly "I'm going to miss you so much" "are you sure it's not my boobs your going to miss?" I tease making her croak up a laugh mixed with tears. I hug her tightly "I'm going to miss you too" she pulls away and we both wipe out tears away "promise to look after yourself and do all the things we practiced" I nod "yeah but only if you look after yourself too" Lizzie smiles "of course". We sit in silence just taking eachothers features "promise you'll come back to me" "well yeah! Obviously!!". We say our final goodbyes and Lizzie gets out the car with her suitcase and wheels in across the road where she blows me her final kiss and disappears into the terminal.
I arrive back home and put the kettle on for a warm drink because I feel like I needed coffee right now. I butter two slices of bread and out a slice of ham and cheese in for my cheese toastie. I put it in the oven and sit on the counter taking small sips of my coffee waiting for it to be ready.
Living in Lizzies house without her for six months is going to be weird and not seeing her for six months is going to be even weirder. She's going to be back a month before Scarlett goes into labour and that feels like ages away to me so it's going to be a really long six months on my own.
I sit at the table and eat my toastie cheese and ham sandwich whilst watching the television. Lizzie doesn't understand how hard this will be for me without her. This is when I wish we had some kind of pet, just so I'm not bored on days like these when I'm alone. It's crazy really, I've lived all my life without Lizzie and now I'm with her it's hard to be without her.
