WHO AM I? (2) (SHANKS X READER)

Chapter thirty-two

You looked blankly at the night sky as you counted the stars.

You were laying down alone somewhere isolated thinking about everything you’ve done in your life, you didn’t hurt anybody who didn’t deserve it… You never wanted status like everyone else… you never wanted money like everybody else… you never wanted fame like everybody else… you never wanted anything… anything but peace… that was your only wish.. peace! Does it sound like a hard request?! No, obviously no! But of course! You’re a cursed person who has to suffer their whole entire life! There was never a single day in your life that you didn’t suffer in! After all, you’re the daughter of two fucking murders! Your mother is a murder, your father is a murder! And even your biological father is a fucking murder! And you, had to be the one who suffer the consequences of their actions.

Obviously it’s always the children who have to suffer for their parents actions. You looked up at the night sky and sighed “when is the day that I have a rest in? When is the day that I finally get the peace I want?!” You groaned and glared at the sky ‘₴Ʉ₣₣ɆⱤ’ (Suffer) laughed the voice in your head “Shut the fuck up! You’re literally my devil fruit power! You’re supposed to symphonize with me!” you shouted getting up “Come out fucker! I dare you to fucking face me!” you added glaring at the nothingness when a shadow formed in front of you.

And in came Dominic who you hated with every living cell and bone in your body. “My, my~ why are you so angry? Is it because your beloved child is dead? Or is it because you know, that your dear brother is in a critical condition?” he questioned chuckling.

You jumped on him and punched him in the face straight “Or perhaps it’s because you’re a fucking annoying piece of shit?” You smiled “Come on~ no hard feeling” he chuckled as he put his hand on his bruised face ‘I’m in immense danger’ “I will tell you this one. Fucking. Time” you growled walking closer to him “Don’t mention my family” you threatened as you held his collar and pulled him down staring him directly in the eyes.

He nodded feeling quite intimidating by you “Sooo? What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be with your little lover man?” he questioned smiling nervously “Do I like I’m in a position that allow me to interact with people?” you asked back “Oh yeah~ you’re so pissed off that if someone just touch you wrongly you’d wipe the whole floor with them” he laughed as you let him go and he floated up “I’m really considering the fact I wanna kill you and get rid of my powers eternally” you chuckled “And I’m not kidding” you said seriously then sighed and layed back down “Now shut up and let me drown in self hatred” you mumbled now looking way tired for anything “Well, I’m sorry Mrs. ‘I left my husband because my child died’ but you need to move your ass up and train. Do you think drowning in your ‘self hatred’ is gonna help? Your child is gone, nothing is gonna change. Do you want everything to happen again? How many times did you lose? How many times did you fail? How many times will you accept defeat? Don’t you want to have ‘peace’? Then destroy everything! Destroy all the people you consider a threat! Do you think people will just listen to you and be very considerate of your happy ideals? What good are your happy ideals if you do nothing to make them a reality? Peace was never an option. You need to prevent those you ‘care’ about from getting hurt! Do you want to lose everyone?! Imagine that shanks somehow got hurt?! What would you do? Cry about it? That’ll make your enemies think you’re weak, prove them wrong. Do you think that grief, pain and suffering was made for you to go down? No. It’s made for you to get stronger! It’s made for you to push through it! You should get up and move on!” Dominic encouraged “Didn’t you try to kill me?” you asked and he fell down comically “That’s what you’re worried about?!” he shouted “I mean you just suddenly started becoming nice? Kinda concerning considering the fact when I was in the past you tried killing me” you shrugged getting up “Oh come on! Me and my past self aren’t the same person!” he protested but you just blinked and looked at him “You’re the same person just stuck in a devil fruit for more time” you sighed and punched a tree and it broke with multiple trees behind it “More likely, the time I spent in the devil fruit is insane. I’ve changed” he chuckled as he appeared in front of you “Look at how strong you are, you didn’t even use haki” he added “I hate everything” you sighed and kicked another tree causing the same result “You should go to your lover boy, there’s something terribly wrong with the signals I’m getting” he said and entered your body, you felt more energy in your body.

You teleported to your base and walked in, seeing shanks and Benn arguing about something. Shanks looked so stressed out while Benn looked tired as shit, you just walked to shanks and hugged him. That is when the two finally noticed your presence, they both stopped arguing about whatever it was and Benn walked away. You looked up at your red-haired lover and smiled reassuringly “I’m sorry y/n..” he apologized making you confused “What do you-“ you couldn’t complete your question when you felt something Peirce through your stomach “Sh.. shanks?” You coughed up blood as you looked down and saw a knife coated in haki through your stomach “I’m sorry” he apologized once again brushing some hair out of your face, your eyes felt heavy and your wound couldn’t heal properly somehow.

You fell down, yet you smiled “I… forgive you..” some tears fell from your eyes ‘Years had passed until the death of our beloved warrior had happened. She was killed by none other than shanks. The reasons are still unknown yet the mystery is still going. Was it on intentions or was an accident? Was he controlled or was he in complete consciousness of his actions? It will never be known’ you thought remembering what you read before. And you fell unconscious with the last thing you see was red eyes.

You sat down in complete darkness rethinking of all you’ve done throughout your years of living, nothing making sense to you then it clicked to you “he was… no… it can’t be! I thought he was over it! He still isn’t going on about the revenge thing isn’t he?! I thought…” you mumbled looking down ‘he.. didn’t betray me… Right?’ you thought your eyes dimming. When a light appeared in front of you and your mother stood there. You looked up at her, she was smiling yet her smile made you sick instead of comforting you like it used to “Look at how pathetic you are~ you’re really going to cry over a man?” She laughed making you curl up more on yourself “no, shut up! I’m not pathetic!” you shouted “Ah~ men are such a manipulative creatures…look at you~ going to cry over your beloved shanks who you knew would betray you~ such a sad lonely child you are.. can’t you learn from your mistakes?! Your father.. your brother… your son…now your husband! Just how low could you go? Your father, left. Your brother, lied. Your son, dead. Your husband, betrayal. Every man in your life is always gone! Don’t you learn?” she laughed making you shake “No! You’re lying! Leave! Leave! Stop lying to me!! My father didn’t leave! My brother isn’t gone! Don’t bring my son into this! Shanks didn’t betray me! This is all a nightmare! I’ll wake up soon! Nothing is real… I’ll wake up… I’ll wake up..” you were hyperventilating at this point as you rocked yourself back and forth “How sad~ you still believe in them..? You’ll see” she smiled and disappeared just like she came. You were shaking when your father formed in front of you “D-Dad?” you stuttered looking up “How many times do I need to remind you! I’m not your father!” he shouted as he took a fist full of your hair and your breath fasted “I’m… Sorry” you apologized crying “just look at how pathetic you are! Do I need to remind you how things are done?” he laughed as he punched you and let go of your hair. You fell back due to the hit, you kept crawling backward as he advanced towards you and kicked you. Your heart was racing as you clutched to your stomach as tears streamed down your face “No, my father isn’t like this anymore!” you shook your head as your breathing started getting heavier.

Footsteps come towards you and you looked up to see Marco holding Kai with him who was covered with blood and crying “How could you… how could you do this to us? How could you sacrifice us?! What did your child do to die this young?! What did we do to deserve this?! All of our pain and suffering was because of you! Your selfish actions are the cause of this!” he blamed you for everything, he was blaming you for all of the problems that happened, he’s blaming your selfish actions for all of this. Your eyes darted everywhere, you couldn’t focus on anything “Marco isn’t like this too… stop… stop!” you cried as you stood up and instead of Marco and your child shanks stood in front of you, glaring at you “Did you think I’ll ever forget? Did you think I’ll forget that your father killed my family? Did you think I’ll forget that your father killed my parents? Did you think I’ll forget he raped my sister? Tortured me? Hunted me down? I’ll never forget! He was the reason to my suffering, he was the reason I’m like this. I’ll never, ever! Forgive nor forget that fact. You being his daughter just means you’re the exact same as him, to me you’re nothing but a fucking murder. You mean nothing to me, I was just toying with you this whole time! And you were so~ dumb that you didn’t even notice!” he laughed and you looked down “Shanks isn’t like that… everything is an illusion!” you shouted looking up and seeing it there was nothing at all in front of you just darkness and more darkness…

“Get me out of here please…” you fell to your knees and begged that whatever trapped you here is going to let you out eventually…