Surrender To Love

10. Music to My Ears

(A/N: The song above is the song Astrid plays in the car)

I wake up to the sound of Astrid's alarm ringing in my ear. "Fuck, turn it off, Ass,"

I spent the night at Astrid's house after work. Which I have been doing a lot often. Me and I have been talking exclusively for about 5 months but we still haven't met each other's friends and family. I'm just not sure I'm ready for that yet, I also don't know when we are considered girlfriends. "Girlfriends" that scares me. Astrid doesn't budge and the alarm continues to go off. For no fucking reason.

We are going to the Billie Eilish concert today and I am so fucking excited. Although a loud ass alarm is not the way to start the day. "Ass the alarm!" I say a little louder this time, she doesn't budge. "Ass!" I shout.

"W-what?" She says clearly annoyed. She hears the alarm and turns it off. "I told you to stop calling me that," she laughs.

"Your name is Astrid and you have a fat ass," I say back right before she smacks me on the arm. We're pretty comfortable talking to each other that way, despite never having sex together. We're just waiting for the right time. I'm in no rush, trust me.

"Get up and make me breakfast," Astrid demands. I look at her and she's still half asleep, I roll my eyes and then off the bed. Making my way to the kitchen, I'm greeted by a tiny human.

"Well hello there," I say in a very bad British accent and Aniyah laughs. I'm so glad the girls don't look alike, I would never know if June didn't have vitiligo like her beautiful mom. "Happy birthday crazy girl,"

"Thank you! I'm five now," she says and holds out her five fingers I laugh as I enter the kitchen. "What you gonna make?"

"Are pancakes good?" I ask the birthday princess. She nods her head and goes to her mom's room. I get to make the pancakes. I add water to the pancake mix and whisk it up. I grab a pan and turn on the fire. I take butter and place it on the pan only to hear it sizzle.

I pour some batter into a pan and add two tiny circles on the top creating a Mickey Mouse. I flip the pancake and after I do, I feel arms wrapped around my waist, June. I'm glad the girls are close to me and I don't necessarily feel like a mother to them and they know me as "mommy's friend". Astrid says the girls are aware of her sexuality due to the fact of her having a girlfriend before. They aren't confused about it and mainly don't ask questions, nor do they care. We have a close bond, we play and eat together a lot. They're happy around me and not afraid to show their true selves. It's amazing.

There's only one person to blame for that, Astrid. She's an amazing mom. She talks to them a lot about feelings and how to calm them down when they get angry. There was one time when June got mad at Aniyah for taking a book from her hands. June hit Aniyah causing her to cry. I remember Astrid calmly telling June that hitting hurts us all not just Aniyah. Soon June went over and apologized to her sister. It was amazing how she controlled two four-year-olds, maybe it was just the bare minimum. I wouldn't know.

She tells me she doesn't regret having her kids but the time. She always knew she'd be a good mom because her mom was to her. She just wished it was more down the future. And I don't blame her. I don't think I could handle a kid and trying to become a doctor.

"What's up, bug?" I say rubbing June's arms.

"I'm five!" She shouts and lets go of me. I laugh and get back to flipping. I take another pan and place it on the burner next to it. I grab some eggs while the pancake cooks and place them on the counter. I get a bowl and crack eggs into it. When I get the desired amount I pour it into the pan that was smeared with melted butter.