Sea Shadow (General Kirigan & Nikolai Lantsov)

Chapter 26

Truth

The months went through and summer arrived. Kaida was still Nikolai's personal guard.

Nikolai had tried to talk with her on several occasions but she just avoided him. But the truth was that she was dying to talk with him, she missed him. She had barely slept since she arrived in Ravka, her nightmares were getting worse.

Kaida missed Nikolai very much, too much. The days by his side were getting harder and harder to bear and the nights were impossible.

She did not sleep, nightmares tormented her every time she closed her eyes and the only thing she wanted to do was for Nikolai's arms, the only person she had ever felt safe with, to surround her and save her from her monsters.

The months at the Palace became tedious and the only thing that occasionally cheered her up were the afternoons she spent with Jake and the others.

On the other hand, Mal had taken to drinking and fighting with other soldiers including Grisha. Kaida had to admit that at first she thought it was a bad idea and still did but watching the fights was a great distraction until one day Alina showed up making Kaida feel all her pain, loathing and outrage. From that day on, watching the fights stopped being something entertaining for Kaida, so in her free time she dedicated herself to hide in the pages of the books in the library.

Kaida was standing in the room where Nikolai was next to his brother Vasily talking.

"The Darkling has not made any moves in the last few months and that is certainly disturbing," Nikolai said looking at a map of Ravka.

"We should strike first," Vasily said.

"What?" Nikolai asked incredulously. "That would be suicide, The Darkling has his shadow monsters and Grisha following him. Attacking without knowing will get us killed," Nikolai said.

"I think that would be the best option and we can get rid of the war for good," Vasily said.

"I don't know if it's your bottle of kvas you drank or your stupidity that clouds your judgment," Kaida knew Nikolai lost his temper easily in front of his brother, but his tone was so subtle and delicate that it sounded like he was praising him.

Vasily's face turned red. "Remember little bastard that you are nothing more than another person who will have to lay at my feet when I am King so watch your vocabulary. You're going to marry the sun summoner thinking it will help you, but deep down you'll always be a bastard who will never make it to the throne," Vasily said angrily inches from Nikolai's face.

Nikolai took a step back and threw a small smile in his face. "You are right, excuse me," Kaida could feel the anger and pain in Nikolai. It didn't matter how much he tried, the word "Bastard" still affected him. Nikolai walked out of the room and Kaida followed him.

"Nikolai," Kaida called him. "Nikolai," she followed him into an empty room. "Nikolai," she called again.

"What?" he asked abruptly.

"Are you okay?" she asked worriedly.

"Now you talk to me?" he asked angrily.

"I know that what your brother said affected you," she said.

"After all this month now, you decided to worry about me?" he said, annoyed.

"I always worried about you," Kaida said.

"Really? You haven't talk to me for months,"

"What did you expect me to do?" Kaida asked, crossing her arms over her chest.