Sea Shadow (General Kirigan & Nikolai Lantsov)

Chapter 35

Lumiya

Kaida opened her eyes, Nikolai was sleeping pleasantly next to her. She had woken up because she felt a presence in the room that it wasn't invited to.

"What are you doing here?" Kaida asked, looking at him with anger.

"I wanted to see you," he said.

"Why?" she asked, standing up from bed.

"You look really happy sleeping with the prince sleeping by your side," he said looking at Nikolai.

"What do you want, Alexander?" she asked, looking at him seriously.

"Alexander," he said slowly. "Quite boring and simple name,"

"Then change it. I don't care. What. are. you. doing. here?"

"I wanted you to know that I forgive you," he said, taking a step closer to her.

"Forgive me for what?" Kaida asked with a frown.

"For trying to kill me and betraying me," he said.

"I don't want your forgiveness," Kaida said.

"Are you sure?" Kaida looked at him. Part of her needed to hear those words, after all she loved him, and part of her still loved him. He saved her, he was the one that showed her she wasn't weak, he was the one that taught her to use her small science and to project herself.

"I loved you, that I have to admit it," Kaida said. "But you had caused too much pain. And that's not easy to forget," she said looking away with sadness in her eyes.

"You look away because you know part of you still loves me," he said, taking another step towards her. "Come with me, Kaida," he said taking his hand to Kaida's cheek. "They don't understand you the way I do,"

Kaida kept silent for a few seconds. "If I go with you, what would happen to my friends? To Nikolai? Would you kill them expecting me to stay by your side watching them die?" He didn't answer, and Kaida realized, maybe a part of her still loved him, but the pain, the anger, the betrayal, were bigger. She was grateful to him because of what he did in the past for her, but not any more. He was a monster, he wanted to kill her friends and the man she loved. She needed to stop him.

"I loved you, yes. And maybe part of me still does, but the anger I feel, the pain, the betrayal are bigger than the love I once had for you. And I will stop you," she said firmly.

"You don't hate me?" he asked curiously, she had said she felt angry, in pain, betrayal, but she didn't say she hated him.

"I...I don't think I can hate you," she said, not looking at him.

"We are the same, Kaida," he said, taking a step towards her.

"I am nothing like you," Kaida said, snapping her head up to look at him. "You are alone, the people that follow you are because they are scared, not because they are loyal. You have no one. But I...I have friends, I have people that love me, that protects me. I have people that if I die I know they would mourn me, cry me, grief me. Who will cry you when this war is over? Who will mourn you? Who will grief you?"

"You," he said it without hate, without hard feelings. He said it with sadness and what looked like shame.

Kaida frowned her brows in confusion and took her hand to her cheek feeling her fingertips wet, she hadn't realized she was crying. She cleaned the tears abruptly and rudely with her hand.