Can't Stop | HoonSuk [✓]

20

“I'm sorry.. I just..” Jihoon looked confused after I said that. He probably just realized what he had done. That’s already expected though. Which friends kissed each other? But drunk habits can be an exception, right? Still. It’s not like I’m going to pretend that I didn’t remember what had happened tomorrow because I was too drunk or anything. I chose this. My mind is just a little bit cloudy but I am totally aware that I want to kiss this guy in front of me. Having the alcohol in my system gives me a little more courage that I probably couldn’t even have if I’m in my sober state. Because I'm a coward. But yeah. Which friends kiss each other? It will be an awkward situation between us.

There’s a hesitation in Jihoon’s eyes as he tried so hard to avoid my gaze. I can’t help but to keep staring at his lips. I like the feel of his lips on mine. I should’ve done it earlier. My eyes dropped to his Adam apple going up and down as he swallowed his saliva. I look back at his eyes. Still, not looking at my direction. I quickly cupped his face and forced him to look at me. Jihoon looked shocked at my sudden action but it successfully made him look directly at me. Beautiful. This man is very beautiful. I wonder what’s on his mind right now.

For me, his friend of more than 10 years suddenly kissed him. What did he think about it? He did look shocked when I first kissed him but he initiated the later kiss. We shared an intimate kiss before he pulled out. Did he just realize that he made a mistake? For me, the kiss was never a mistake. But it might be for Jihoon. He asked me before about if a close friend suddenly confessed to us, what would I do? Maybe he just remembered that he has a crush. Did I make him forget about his crush for a tiny little time? I don’t know if I should be glad or sad. I don’t know.

"Don't think about anything anymore," I said. More like begging. The thought of Jihoon having a crush made me feel down all of a sudden. It should be me. But I wanted to cheer for him. Jihoon, who I knew for a very long time, finally knew and felt what love is. What a crush feels like. I should have been happy for him. But I want him to only belong to me. Even only for this moment. "Just kiss me,"

Jihoon took a deep breath before finally pulling my face closer and slammed our lips together. The tingling sensation as our lips touched is such an adrenaline rush. I loved it. I closed my eyes as I felt his lips move on mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and the back of his head. Pulling him closer deepened our kiss. I need more. I want to feel more.

I licked his lips, before I pushed my tongue into his mouth. I can feel his breath hitch a bit before he lets me do what I'm doing. My tongue licked his teeth and tongue. Our lips are still connected as our tongues start to massaging each other. I can feel like I'm out of breath. Jihoon now tilted his head and changed our position, giving me a chance to catch my breath. Jihoon pulled me to sit on his lips without breaking the connection of our lips. I ran my fingers in his hair. Gently grabbing his hair as we keep on kissing.

Jihoon started nibbling my lower lip and I just let him. There's a lot of unexplainable feelings that I'm currently feeling. But I want this to keep on going. After nibbling my lip, he started to push his tongue inside my mouth. His tongue dominated my mouth, almost making me breathless. Our lips almost didn't touch as our tongues kept massaging each other. I can feel our saliva dropping down to my chin. Gross. But it does stop us from doing what we're doing. Jihoon pulled out as the both of us started to have a hard time breathing.

We silently stare at each other while catching our breath. I might sound crazy but seeing Jihoon with the saliva dripping from his lips, his swollen lips, making him look extra sexy. I want to eat him. I want him. I started to leave feather kisses on the saliva trails from the corner of his lips down to his chin and jawline. I nibbled his earlobe, earning a soft moan from him. Such an inviting moan. I touched his lower lips. Jihoon parted his lips a little as my finger touched his lips. I pushed two of fingers inside his mouth and pulled out his tongue. Jihoon just put his tongue out as I stared at him. Sexy. Should I take his picture now?

But no. I don't want to waste any more time now. I licked his tongue and started to kiss him again. Jihoon just went with my flow which is great. Let us drown in this moment and have the awkward session later.

I didn't even notice when but it seems like I fell asleep in the middle of our kissing session. How did I realize it? Because I was suddenly woken up by the vibrating sound of my phone and when I opened my eyes, I'm already in bed. In Jihoon's bed. While Jihoon is nowhere to be found. The last thing I ever remembered is me and Jihoon still kissing on the couch in the living room. I didn't even remember how long we kissed each other but I definitely can still feel the sensation of his lips caressing my lips. Jihoon probably carried me here after I fell asleep. He definitely is currently sleeping on the couch because that's what he always did.

He will always let me sleep on his bed while he sleeps on the couch in the living room whenever I sleep over. Always. I grabbed my phone. It's Yena who has been calling me. For 5 times already. I put my phone on silent mode yesterday, that's why it only vibrates. I already promised to accompany Yena before she flies back to Japan for work. She has been here since 2 days ago and my parents have been asking me to keep her company. I looked at the time, I can go back to my place and take a shower first I guess.

I got off the bed and walked out of the bedroom. I can see Jihoon sleeping on the couch. I walked toward the couch and squatted down. I just stared at his sleeping face. Sleeping so peacefully after the hot and messy kissing session we shared yesterday. His lips looked swollen as well. For some reason, it makes me want to bite it. I quickly shook my head. Shook the thought off my mind. I need to get things straight with Jihoon. I'll try to find a suitable time to talk to Jihoon about it. If he asks me to apologize, I will. And if he wants me to act like it never happened, I will as well. I'm just hoping that he won't suddenly avoid me or something.

I am stupid, a coward and greedy. I'm stupid for thinking that I can get over what the hell we have done yesterday just after a talk. Like I didn't even have the confidence that we can act like nothing happened but I still proceeded to kiss him yesterday anyway and tried to think of the solution later. I'm a coward for not being able to be honest about my own feelings. Why? Because I'm afraid that it will change my relationship with Jihoon. But still stupid enough to kiss him yesterday anyway. And I'm greedy to have Jihoon to still stay by my side even after the stupid things I've done yesterday.

I softly sighed. I love this man too much that I often get overwhelmed by it. I took out a sticky note that I somehow brought with me and left him a note before I walked out from his apartment.