The Proposal

28 - Decision

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My whole life flashed in front of my eyes. Past, present, future.

I felt dizzy all of a sudden from the shock of seeing the positive test result. I had to move closer to my bed and sit down, so I wouldn't fall.

My heart was beating fast against my chest. I was shocked, scared, speechless, and clueless all at once.

All I could think of was.. this couldn't be happening. This can't be happening. I had so many thoughts but none at the same time.

My head was spinning, and my whole world was spinning.

I can't be pregnant. I wasn't ready to be pregnant, especially when the father now thinks this was a mistake. I couldn't.

What was I supposed to do now? I was utterly clueless.

This was just supposed to be a simple goddamn contract, and now it was evolving out of control. How did I get here?

What would my parents think of me now, seeing that I made a horrible mistake by not controlling myself? They would probably be disappointed in me.

My thoughts were scattered. One moment, I was thinking of how to get my career started, and the next moment, I was pregnant. What would this mean for me? For my career?

No.

I couldn't do this.

Just as I was battling with my thoughts, Ruby entered my room.

"Morning Ruby," She walked towards me on the bed, "came to check up on you. How do you feel now?" She asked me, oblivious of my current predicament.

I looked at her, my fear probably evident in my eyes.

"Please don't tell me you're still thinking about it," she said, "you deserve better, Crystal," she said. Her words only made me even more worried and concerned.

I looked away from her, not knowing how to tell her. Just last night, I was crying on her shoulders about Nicholas, and now I was pregnant with him.

"Crystal," she called, sounding worried. I looked up at her, speechless while she stared at me as if searching for answers only face. Her eyes then darted to my nightstand where the pregnancy test was.

She stood up from the bed, went to the nightstand, and picked up the test. Then she turned and looked at me with wide eyes.

"What is this?" She asked me. I pursed my lips, unable to answer her question.

"Are you pregnant?" She asked the already obvious question. There was no trace of judgment in her voice, just pure concern and shock.

When she saw that I wasn't saying a word, she came to sit beside me again.

"Talk to me Crystal, what are you thinking?" She asked me as if sensing I was already making a silent decision.

"Are you going to tell him?" At her question, I snapped my head to her.

"No," I immediately replied.