Stay Strong Seventeen

Seungcheol

He was struggling the breathe, the thoughts that piled up inside his head made him stutter and stumble on his own words.

Nothing made sense and nothing was enough ... he wasn't enough.

These thought creeped inside his head for a while now, he's doing his best and more but nothing seemed to work.
He wasn't good enough.

There was always something missing or something falling apart. He was their leader but managing this big number wasn't easy and he tried his all to make everything better for everyone.

He was eating himself up when Dino fell and got that nasty bruise on his rib.
He blamed himself for not paying attention to him when they practicing intensively.

When Wonwoo had that cold and was coughing for days. He blamed himself when the boy literally just sat on the sofa while filming and asked someone to take his cough away.
He blamed himself for not being able to get him a time off.

He blamed himself for a lot of things and not being the leader SVT deserved was the worst.

He was hyperventilating, struggling to regular his breaths. It was strange, he never experienced anything like this before and e wasn't sure what to do.

He was in his room, on his computer desk doing some work when it started. He realized that he was sitting there since morning going over their schedules, calling their managers and meeting with others in between.
It was a bit late and everyone already left, he was alone and he feared the worst.

He fell to the floor and curled himself in a ball, not really knowing what was happening to him or how to make it stop.
Just like the Angel he is ... Jeonghan for some random reason walked in to find him sprawled on the ground.

"CHEOL?" He called his name a few times as he helped him sit upright. Seungcheol was out of breaths, trembling and paler than he had ever seen him before. Jeonghan asked him different questions but the leader wasn't able to reply and his trembling only got worse.

And that's when it hit Jeonghan

"Are you having a panic attack?" He questioned, his voice lowered to a more calm tone and his face softened almost about to cry over his friend.

He simply brought Seungcheol in a hug, patting his back softly calming him down

"It's okay, you'll be okay, there's nothing to be afraid of, we're all here"

Jeonghan whispered for a while and soon, Mingyu seemed to have joined the two inside the room only to find Seungcheol in Jeonghan's arms looking all pale and distressed.

Mingyu jolted and immediately join Jeonghan to take a seat next to him and asked what was going on and if he could chelp?

Jeonghan asked him to bring a blanket for Seungcheol keep him warm and just give them some space. Seungcheol was having a panic attack and probably his first too, he needed the space.

The place was soon silent again, Jeonghan continued to calm Seungcheol down slowly feeling him relaxing in his arms. His breaths were going back to normal but by that time, he was too exhausted.

Mingyu and Jeonghan helped place him on the bed while Seungcheol simply gave in to whatever they did to him. He effortlessly dropped his head on the pillow and Jeonghan didn't leave his side with Mingyu around they started calmly talking about random things trying to keep Seungcheol's mind away from whatever that was going on inside his head.

In the end, he was slowly surrendering to his tired body and simply drifted to sleep.

When he woke a couple of hours later, it was to the quiet of his room and the coziness to his blankets. He looked around but nobody was there however, the room smelled sweet and some muffled voices could be heard coming from the living room.

He wanted to join but soon decided not to, he didn't feel like leaving his bed right now. His mind wondered around in circles, he had a panic attack earlier and he was tired and confused, he had no clue where to begin to explain himself to Jeonghan and Mingyu.

But luckily, he didn't have to.

Jeonghan stopped by a while later, he slowly opened the door to check on Seungcheol and he was just sitting on his bed staring into nothing. He smiled warmly at him and simply walked in to sit next to his leader.

"You seem a bit lost ... do you want to tell me about it?" Jeonghan asked voice calm and just waiting for his reaction

"I don't know what happened Han" Seungcheol looked a bit tired and confused "I've been really anxious and nothing makes sense anymore"

"You're doing your best nobody's blaming you if you feel this way, it's normal to feel anxious, you have so much on your plate" ... "Don't let it get to you, we are worried about you"

Seungcheol nodded "I know" ... "I think I need a break to catch my breaths"

Jeonghan smiled "You deserve a break" ... "Maybe also get a doctor appointment? Some help could be could"

There's no doubt that Seungcheol was hesitant but soon, he agreed "Yeah that'll be okay I guess"

Jeonghan smiled relieved to hear that, he tried to be as gentle as possible and not to say anything out of place to upset the leader

"How about you come join us?" ... "We made dinner and the boys have been waiting for you to wake up" ... "Aren't you hungry?"

Yes he was so he nodded

"Do you want to join us then?"

Seungcheol nodded again