Stay Strong Seventeen

Jun

Opening his eyes was mission impossible and taking that next breath was again extremely difficult.

It was too loud
People cheering and screaming his name and he was behind stage, his back to the wall while sitting on the floor straddling to keep his breaths in check

He heard people around him talk and some of them were loud, he heard words like "Panic attack" and "Oxygen mask" and "Get help" but there was nothing he could do

He was frozen

He tried to stand up but Gosh his legs felt like jelly and he wobbled falling forward and his face almost hit the floor if it wasn't for Seungcheol. The leader came rushing in after hearing from their staff that Jun wasn't responding.

"Jun? ... Junhui? It's okay just breathe" that's all he could do anyways and it was already too difficult "It's okay no pressure" the leader continued "Breathe, don't worry about anything else, you're safe here you'll be just fine"

"Breathe"

Seungcheol coed calmly in spite of the total chaos surrounding them and when Jun's breathing seemed to be getting better, the leader gently lifted him up to his feet and walked with him somewhere quieter.

"It's okay, you can lay down here" Seungcheol pushed him down gently, even Jun didn't know where he was at the moment but he trusted his leader nonetheless.

He fell down on the soft pillow, they had pillows in here? He had no clue

He was shaking and Seungcheol held his hand tightly "It's okay Jun, it will pass just breathe"

Seungcheol was right, it will pass but before it did, Jun will be powerless. It happened before so this wasn't new to him nor to his teammates, he trusted them but his panic attacks were getting worse recently and he would be frozen for a long time before he either runs out of energy and either faints or surrender to sleep, or would slowly snap out of it. But either way, it's the rest of the members that put him down to sleep or coed him all the time and he felt safer when they were around.

Jun's breaths were balancing again and his mind was less foggy to realize a while later that Seungcheol had to leave his side. He had to leave ans join him too but couldn't, their manager pinned him down
"It's just the ending scene Jun you don't have to go, relax"

Jun missed the ending

He felt so guilty, he tried his best not to break down until the end and he couldn't wait the final bow to fall to his knees.

He closed his eyes feeling his tired body shake in both frustration and anger.

He tried to sit up slowly, he opened his eyes to find Joshua by his side. It was over, the concert was over and he was struggling to keep going.

"Hey you're alright, steady breaths" Joshua helped him sit up and take his jacket off. He was slowly coming back and it took him a bit more time but he changed out of his costume and freshened up a little before they all hit the road again.

Jun was silent and everyone was worried about him still

"Jun?" Jeonghan called and reached out to hold his hand "Are you feeling any better? Do we need to take you to the clinic?"

Jun shook his head "No" he whispered but Jeonghan knew that there was more to his answer

"Talk to us okay?"

"I don't think I can do this anymore"

Jun said capturing everyone else's attention, he cant do what anymore?

"What do you mean?"

His eyes swelled up and he suddenly couldn't look at the other in the eyes anymore, he couldn't look at anyone else

"I need a break, I don't want to do this right now, I want you to get away"

Jeonghan was worried, everyone was worried

"If a break is what you need Jun, then have it" Seungcheol's voice was heard through the crowded bus

"I don't know how long it will take though"
Jun confessed, he wasn't sure, he didn't know what else to say or do

"As long as you need" Seungcheol reassured and Jeonghan tightened his grip around Jun's hand and brushed his wet cheeks with his thumb when the tears started rolling down his face

The healing road was long and scary but Jun had to work through it.
They all recommended that Jun should get a full check up first and talk about whatever clouded his mind and if he didn't want to talk to them, then they can find a specialist or invite his parents to stay with him.

They all agreed to give him the space and the time he needs.

Jun just needed time to heal.

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Requested by Deletinggg230