Feel like dying | Seungmin

-17-

At lunch time everyone had something to eat, but Seungmin. It became normal for the others that Seungmin wouldn't eat lunch too anymore. Even if they brought him something, he wouldn't take it and say he didnt feel hungry.

Also became normal that Chungho would sit at their table. Most times he would sit next to Seungmin but today he sat next to the only guy with long blonde hair. Seungmin looked at them the whole time. Hoping he would keep what he said.

Then thoughts came back of the time he had trusted Chungho in his life. The first time he tried to touch him anywhere. All the first times. Everything came back as if it was a train with little children laughing at him. 'You are such a loser. Even if they knew, they wouldn't care. They won't help you.' Seungmin felt his breathing become faster.

No, not right here in this crowded cafeteria. Not for the third time this month. This was abnormal. Seungmin walked away from the table, no one could see him in such conditions. Some known voices were heard behind him. He tried to walk away fastly. No one could see him like this, but he was just out of the cafeteria and walking seemed to go wrong. He looked at the wall.

He had to help himself now. This time it couldn't take one and a half hours. It had to be fixed faster. Only that already made his panicking worse. He didn't know if the people in the hallway had just gone silent, or if it was one of the side effects.

Something seemed to touch his back. Seungmin fell down to the ground. There he felt a thing again holding his hands. Immediately he tried to get his hands out of the other's. He heard something like his name being called, which means it was likely not to be Chungho. Maybe he could trust this person.

'You might trust them but they will never trust you and how could you trust someone that doesn't trust you.' He made a cross with his arms, hiding his just exposed face. "Seungmin, let me help you," the voice was soft and sounded so genuine. He knew who this was.

He opened his eyes to make sure. "Yes, you are doing good, can you keep them open?" Seungmin quickly nodded but then closed them again.