Hells Queen

epilogue

 A bright light shines over me, my eyes blinking open, a shadow casting over me as a figure comes to stand over me. The light shining behind them, a glow wrapping around their body.

As they come closer to me, my vision becomes clearer, a sob wracked my body as I recognize my husband bending close to me. He tells me something, but I can't hear it over my own cries, heart racing as he lifts me up. Placing me against his chest as he holds me close to him.

"I'm so sorry," I repeat over and over, tears bleeding into a spot on his shirt as I try to pull him closer to me. "I didn't mean to, I couldn't stop myself, I didn't know what was happening."

I try to explain everything I felt in that moment. But even now it's too much, my skin seems to burn as I try to remember exactly what I did. Not able to, I catch my breath.

Holding my clasped hands to my chest, I finally start to hear Lucifer telling me to take deep breaths. I do exactly that, counting a rhythm to his hand sliding up and down my spine. I finally look up at him, my chest slowly untightening as he looks at me with his hazel eyes.

"What happened?" I whisper, shame filling me.

"We don't need to talk about it," he tells me, kissing my forehead as he continues rocking us back and forth.

"I don't remember," I whisper honestly. "Do I need to remember?"

"No," his words came fast, like he was waiting for me to ask that. "Everything is okay now, no one will ever get you to that state again."

That state.

The state of complete and utter anger. That's what I remember, I remember anger.

We stay in silence for a couple minutes before I feel a tear roll on my cheeks, but it's not mine. Looking up, I bring my hand up to Lucifer's cheek. He opens his mouth, before shaking his head, closing it again. A couple seconds later he does it again. Looking away from my face, he stares at the room around us.

I continue looking at my husband.

"Lilith," his voice breaks, raw emotion taking over as he continues not meeting my gaze. "What you did, the anger you felt, it reminded me of the man I used to be. Of the rampages that started wars, that killed millions."

"I'm sorry," I whisper, my own tears now rolling down my cheeks.

Raising my chin to look at him, he finally meets my gaze, "I'm not mad at you. I was scared for you. I've lost it many times to my anger, I've shared this before, but the guilt that eats at you never goes away. It just grows stronger with each time it happens. It never goes away. I didn't want that for you. It would have destroyed you."

"I'm okay," I tell him.

"You're okay," he reminds himself, crushing me closer to him, I let him. We both need it.

A knock on the room door has me turning my head, now realizing that we are in the room that I woke up in the first time that I came here. The windows now shut, another knock comes through the door.

"I can tell them to go away," Lucifer whispers, kissing my hair.

"It's okay," I whisper back.

"Come in," my husband states, his voice carrying, the double doors instantly opening.

Isabania is the first to walk through the doors, the rest of our family coming in on her heels. The minute our eyes meet, a sob breaks her lips as she flings herself at me. Pushing Lucifer off me as she cradles me into a hug.

We sit there for minutes, holding each other, both of us crying. Soon she's being pulled back, Grim holding her as he gives me a nod, a smile on his lips before retreating a few steps back with her.

I'm wrapped in another hug as Lorenzo takes her place, this time I'm off the bed. Holding me for only a few seconds, he gives me a huge grin, the grin he first gave me when I came here. "Thank you," he tells me, kissing my cheek before stepping back to join his small family.

I look at Harium and laugh as he steps in front of me. His arms raise before dropping to his side. This time, I'm the one to move, I throw my arms around his chest. "Thank you for having my back," I whisper.

We pull away from each, but he smiles a tight lipped smile at me, "always, Lilith."

I look behind me, shuffling back to Lucifer's side, his arm instantly wrapping around my waist.

This is where I belong, in a room with my family.

In the arms of the Devil.