Tutoring (Destiel)

Chapter Five

Castiel started taking a pill every four hours. It was the highest dosage there was, the doctor had said Castiel wouldn't need to ever take that much, but with what Crowley did to Castiel he was in constant pain and didn't want to tell his brother. Not only would mentioning his intensified pain make Michael look at him like he was a coward, but he would also most likely have to tell the doctor or his brother about Crowley, and he did not want to do that.

It was Thursday and Castiel had a tutoring session with Dean. He was apprehensive, mostly because of yesterday. Dean knew one of Castiel's biggest secrets at the moment and he was scared about that. Castiel actually thought that Dean might not come, but he saw him in the classes they had together so he wasn't certain of anything. Dean would catch Castiel's eye, but he'd look away really quick, like he didn't want Castiel to know he was looking. Castiel was also contemplating not going to the library to tutor Dean, although he decided against it. Dean probably won't even come, at least I can read for an extra hour.

By the end of the day Castiel had taken two more pills. He was in a calm state, it was nice for him, he hated being stressed, and his anxiety rarely let Castiel feel as good as he did now. He made his way to the library and sat down at a table. Dean wasn't there so he took out a copy ofFahrenheit 451 and started reading. So far he was enjoying the book, but didn't quite understand the importance of the "mutt".

He only got halfway through the page he was on when he heard the chair across from him scratch against the ground. He looked up at the person who sat down in the seat across from him only to see Dean Winchester.

"Oh, hello, Dean." Castiel greeted. Dean looked angry, but also sad.

"Hey, Cas."

There was silence after that. It was heavy and uncomfortable. Castiel's mind started to fill with uneasiness. He looked at Dean and instantly felt nervous. He was about to say something, anything that came to his mind, but instead Dean started to talk.

"So, I know Mr. Shurley said this was for English," Dean spoke, making Castiel's stomach flutter. How could a voice do that? He thought. "But I was going to ask you to -uh-" he rummaged in his backpack and took out a crumbled piece of paper. "Do you take Latin? And I also need help in Math." Castiel squinted his eyes, thinking for a moment.

"You take Latin?" He sounded impressed and surprised.

"Well, actually I'm failing Latin." Dean half smiled.

"Why don't you just switch to spanish or something?" Castiel asked. Dean shook his head.

"My dad wanted me to learn it a long time ago, and my brothers a freaking genius, so he's blowing right through it easily." Castiel nodded, understanding. He was amazing at school work, but his family was big on football and baseball. Sadly Castiel just wasn't athletic, so Michael and Balthazar (not Gabriel, although he was a soccer superstar) made fun of him a lot, making him feel depressed and worthless. Castiel knew where Dean was coming from.

"Yeah, I can help you." Castiel told Dean. Dean smiled and started taking out textbooks. He isn't going to mention yesterday? Or anything? Just tutoring? Castiel couldn't believe it. Whatever.

Castiel took out his own textbooks, he didn't have the Latin one because he had finished his courses, and was now taking advanced Enochian. His Math and English textbooks were normal because he decided to take the regular classes, but he assumed taking the AP Foreign Languages would help him learn more in a short period of time.

"Do you want to start with English? We have that big test on 1984 in a week."

Dean nodded. "Yeah, believe it or not, but I'm doing worse in that than Math." He laughed. Castiel was a bit suprised, he had a lower grade in math, he thought everyone did. His grade was only worse than everything else by .75%. He still had an A of course though. Castiel shrugged and told him they should review on the topics Mr. Shurley said would most likely be on the test. Dean kinda did a half laugh. "Uh, actually I never read the book." Dean said. Castiel looked at him with wide eyes.

"How didn't you read it?" Castiel asked.

"It was boring as hell." Dean laughed. Castiel's stomach did a sorta flip thing, which made him feel strange.

"I liked it."

"Yeah, because you're the type of person who would like it." Dean returned.

"What is that suppose to mean?"

"Big Brother has total control of you, Cas." Castiel shook his head, showing he didn't understand.

"So you did read it?" He asked.

"No."

"Then how did you know that?"

"What? About Big Brother? Come on, that's a main character. That's the main idea. Even when I try not to pay attention I hear everything about it." Castiel shrugged, he supposed their class talked about Big Brother a lot.

They spent the next hour going through the main ideas, themes, and Castiel wrote a summery as he read it aloud, making sure Dean could at least get a C on the test. Then they moved on to Math. It was actually pretty easy to help Dean, Castiel just had to go through the steps and Dean took it up easily. Castiel began to realize Dean wasn't just a dumb jock.

Then they moved on to Latin.

"So, what are you guys learning in Latin?" Castiel asked. Dean shrugged.

"Simple phrases." Dean responded. Castiel asked for an example. "Things like, Vos postulo ut videre medicum." Castiel stared at Dean. He said that perfectly.

"I don't need to see a doctor." Castiel returned. That's what Dean had said. "And you don't need help with Latin, not if you can say that. Not when you can say it like that." Dean nodded his head, his face stayed stern.

"I told you, my brother's fluent in it, if I ever did need help, I would ask him." Castiel began to stand up.

"Do you even need help in English or Math?" He asked.

"Mr. Shurley sent you to me, of course I need help." He stood up too. "But you also need help." Castiel shook his head.

"No... I don't." He started to leave. He'd have to walk home, but he didn't care. He heard Dean following him. His rib began to hurt again and he grabbed his bottle of pills. He dumped one into his hand and swallowed it dry.

"How many of those have you taken?" Dean asked from behind him. Castiel started walking faster. "I saw you take one at lunch. You probably took one before you came to school." Castiel ignored Dean and opened the front doors. "That's three in eight hours." Suddenly a hand grabbed Castiel's shoulder and stopped him. "Cas, let me take you to a doctor." Dean's voice was calmer. Castiel threw Dean's hand off.

"Piss off, Dean." He returned then started walking back to his house. He didn't hear Dean try to follow.

Castiel sighed and took the bottle of pills from his backpack again. Fuck Dean! Fuck him! He thought. I don't give a shit.

He knew that wasn't true though. He knew Dean was right, he knew Dean meant good, he knew he cared even though he barely knew Castiel.

Castiel fucking loved Dean Winchester.

And that's exactly why he took the extra pill.