𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐍 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐈𝐑𝐄 - 𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐄

𝑰𝑰. 𝐓𝐖𝐎 𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐒

"We have to talk about it at some point."

"There's nothing to talk about."

Bryony sighs, looking over at her best friend. She's been different ever since she came back, and it's concerning. But quite frankly, she'd be more concerned if she had been the same.

"There is. You just don't want to."

"Why is it so important that we talk about it? You saw what happened."

Nova was right. She knew exactly what had happened. She had been in the district square with Ivana and Silas watching the games. She'd seen everything, from the first bloodbath at the cornucopia to the last one.

"Yeah, I did. Which is why we need to talk about-"

"What do you want me to say? That it should've been me?"

"You know that's not what I meant."

"He died because of me. Because I wasn't fast enough to save him. I let him go down to the river alone and it cost him his life."

"You can't save everybody. Nico made his choice. Now you have to make yours."

"And what is that choice?"

"You can keep blaming yourself for something that was out of your control, or you can accept that it wasn't your fault."

Bryony reaches out a hand to rest on top of hers across the table.

"You did everything you could, okay? He knew the risks, and he chose to go. You couldn't have stopped him. We both know you couldn't have changed his mind."

Deep down, Nova knows she's right. But at the same time, she wasn't there. Yes, she saw it onscreen, but she wasn't right in front of him when he was dying, either.

But she knows there isn't any need to discuss that. He meant the same thing to both of them; a best friend. A brother. But now he's gone and there's no bringing him back.

"He always was stubborn, wasn't he?"

Bryony laughs, although it's more of a sob.

"He was the most hard-headed person I've ever met."

She nods. Once he had his mind set on something, he was determined to follow through.

"Did you know Diana's coming back?"

"Yeah. Heard it from Ivana yesterday morning."

Diana Mavros. Nico's (very much absent) mother. She'd vanished from district four years ago, to god knows where. Nico hadn't seen her since he was seven.

Bryony doesn't even bother to hide her distaste for the older woman, scoffing as she leans back in the chair.

"The hell is she coming back for now, anyways? If she actually gave a shit about him, she never would've left."

"Maybe that's why she's back now. Because she feels bad for not being there, and now- now she knows it's too late."

There's a moment of quiet again; it happens a lot more often since he died. Like he's not there to fill the silence with a stupid joke or sarcastic remark. After a second, Bryony clears her throat softly.

"They're- they're having a memorial for him. After your tour."

"Why have they waited this long for one?"

"Well, at first they were waiting to see if his body would be brought back here. And then it wasn't, but you..."

"I wasn't equipped to handle it."

"Yeah. But nobody is expecting you to just get over it. Mom was worried about you."

A small nod.

"It wasn't just that though. When you were ready to... deal with it, I guess, the whole tour thing came up. And Alex really wanted to make sure you'd be there for it."

Alex Mavros. Nico's older brother. They'd never been particularly close friends, but they knew each other well enough to hang around with one another. She knew he would've volunteered in his place had he still been eligible.

"How is he is holding up, anyways?"

"About the same as the rest of us. Just trying to make it through."

"How does he feel about her coming back?"

"I don't know. Haven't heard from him in a couple days."

Alex was never one to be overly social, even at the best of times. But it's a little concerning that he hasn't made an appearance recently. 

"Is he around? Maybe I'll drop by."

"Yeah, I think so. Might be nice for him to see a familiar face with everything that's going on."

A few more inside jokes, and moments of silence later, she's headed out, telling Bryony she'll see her later.

The Mavros family lives on the outskirts of the district, which also happens to be closer to a beach. She and Nico spent a lot of time there when they were younger. But she hasn't been to their home since before the reaping.

She takes a moment to prepare herself. 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, she thinks. Nova knocks quietly and waits.

The door swings open after a moment. Alex almost looks surprised to see her. But before he can open his mouth to speak, he's embraced by Nova in a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

He isn't sure quite exactly what she's apologizing for, but he suspects it's a mixture of guilt over not being able to save him and grief over losing him.

But he can't find it in himself not to return the embrace, so he does. She wasn't planning on being so close to him, but when she saw his red-rimmed eyes and dark half crescents underneath them, she couldn't not try to bring him some comfort.

"How are you doing?"

Her hands are wrapped around a steaming cup of tea, sitting across from Alex at the kitchen table.

"As well as I can be, considering."

Alex can see that look in her eyes. That expression of complete and utter guilt, of failure.

"He wouldn't want you to feel at fault. I know it."

Silence. Then a nod.

"My brother was many things, but the one thing he was not was a coward. I know this with no hesitation, if he were presented with the same choice once more, he would do it all over again."

"He was my best friend until the very end. And... I don't know how to move on without him, Alex."

"I know. He cared for you deeply. He loved you like you were his own sister."

"I loved him too. He was family to me."

"He knows. I know he does. And something I also know in my soul, is that he wouldn't blame you for what happened. He would just be grateful you were there in his last moments. That you told him that he was loved when he- when he went out."

Nova manages a small, watery smile at Alex's words. It's progress, in a way.

"And he... he chose to save you. He didn't have to. But he wanted to save you, because he believed in you. He believed in your strength."

A small nod.

"He didn't die in vain, Nova. He died fighting for a chance for you to live. And that is just the kind of person my brother was."