Too Deep Too Late (Suicidal Izuku Midoriya)

What the morning brings

Slowly Izuku opened his green eyes. It took him only a second to realize that he was not in his bathroom anymore. The familiar white roof of the recovery wing stared at him like a painful wound and absentmindedly he turned his head to look at his arms. There however, he found somebody's hand holding his. He followed it up, up to see his teacher's soft gaze. Aizawa-sensei was there, holding his hand, next to his wounds.

Before Midoriya had a chance to panic, Present Mic spoke.

" Hey, little listener. How are you feeling? Would you like to sleep a bit more?"

" I-uh. N-no thank you. What happened?"

Before they could answer the boy, the white curtain moved, and Recovery Girl stepped inside. Aizawa immediately held Izuku tighter, turning to look at the healer.

" Chiyo."

" Now Midoriya I see you are finally awake. How are you feeling?"

" I- no, what? Why I... Can somebody tell me why I am here?" Izuku stammered.

" Yes, we will explain but all in due time. Firstly here." She gave a paper cup to the boy. " I need you to drink this."

Izuku took it. Inside was a purple liquid, most likely juice, that smelled awfully sweet. It might as well have been soap, because when Izuku drank, it threatened to come back up. He struggled for a while but managed to keep it down. As expected, it was way too sweet.

" I'll give you twenty minutes." The healer told Aizawa and walked off.

" So, Midori-" No that doesn't feel right. "Izuku. Can you tell me about yesterday? How long have you been feeling this way?"

" Sensei I have no idea what you are talking about?"

" Okay let's start with something simpler. How was yesterday?"

" I- uh, nothing special. I woke up early to jog, then went to classes and did my homework. At some point after dinner, I decided to go on a walk around the city. But not far!"

" And then?"

" Well, then I came back and went to sleep." Shota looked at him with annoyance.

" Okay so maybe I did some remodelling on my room and got hurt-"

" I saw the knife. Now if you aren't going to be honest with me, maybe you'll find Hound dog or All mi-"

" No don't tell All might!" He paled. " He cannot know about this."

" Okay let's come back to that later... Now tell us what happened last night."

"... I just had enough. I-I had to just silence the voices for a while. You must understand it really was nothing more than me being too weak to handle the pressure. Everyone is expecting something of me and it's starting to be too much. The constant pressure, the demands, impossible training schedule, the lack of people to rely on. I am everybody's shoulder to lean on, the person to talk to, the rock, the gravity, the voice of reason. But why! What about me?! Who has my back? Who catches me when I fall? This usually helps but. Just forget it, I'll be fine..."

" Izuku, you tried to kill yourself last night. We cannot just ignore it." Mic butted in. His heart hurt to see such a young child be in such pain. This was not normal, even to pros.

" I tried to- what! No! I would never. Not anymore at least."

" Izuku there isn't any use in hiding it anymore. You can be honest with us." Hizashi took the child's hand.

" But I didn't! I just wanted to hurt myself like I always do!"

" You what!" Aizawa was at a loss for words. His problem child does what?

" That's not normal Izu. That's called self-harm!"

" Yeah, I know that I just- I didn't have any other ways to keep the voices at bay."

" Voices? As in-"

" My own thoughts. They say the most cruel things sometimes. When I'm at my weakest. At night..."

At that moment Recovery Girl came back in. She motioned the two men to move and gave a confused Izuku a big kiss. The boy fell down fast asleep. Aizawa looked at a small clock on the wall.

" 5.54 am. The hell spawns have their first class at eight so the more enthusiastic ones must be waking up soon. I have to go clean up before that. Wanna come along?"

Mic, despite the situation, was happy that Sho asked. His husband was quick to shut people out and carry all of their problems by himself but now, he was sharing their burden. In Kirishimas words "That is so manly." Yamada shed a tear. Together they walked across the yard and up the steps to the dorms.

There were only a handful of times that Shota regretted doing something. That time he asked for his coffee with cream and almost had a heart attack (it had been so disgusting), passing that one student that later became a criminal and now, not doing enough to save Midoriya. Yes, there weren't many occasions. But now as he stood inside the 1-A dorms he regretted every single decision that had led to them being there.

Students were running around, some were screaming names, some (Iida) trying to calm everyone down and one explosive blonde had a phone to his ear. Mina sat on the couch with Uraraka, both crying. Aizawa just stared at the chaos feeling at least ten years older.

Was it too late to turn back?

Somebody noticed him and yelled "Aizawa sensei!" He took a deep breath and turned to face a distraught Sero holding on to a paper towel. Come to think of it there were multiple students holding paper towels and rags.

" Sensei! We think Deku's been kidnapped!"

" Mister Aizawa there's a lot of blood! There, in the hallway!"

" We tried calling you-"

" Hey guys Midoriya wasn't in the bathroom eithe- oh hi Aizawa sensei."

The erasure hero activated his quirk.

" Everyone quiet now!"

There was a pause. Each student stopped what they were doing and stood facing their teacher. All the noise came to a such a halt, that Mic had to turn around and laugh silently. Aizawa jabbed him on the side with his elbow. A small "Hi Mic sensei." was the only thing that broke the tension.

" Sensei we must hurry! Midoriya has been ki-"

" No Iida, Midoriya has not been kidnapped. I know where he is and I can guarantee that he is indeed alive."

" B-but there was blood leading from his door and..." Uraraka had to blow her nose.

" Yes. I know that and I was intending on cleaning it before you woke up."

" If Deku's okay then why was there blood?" Kaminari asked.

" Listen, it is not my place to tell. If he wants to then he'll do it when he's ready and if I catch any of you pestering him, I won't hesitate to give out months detention." He glared and the students sweatdropped.

" Okay so is there anything more to clean?"

" No sensei."

" Good. Then we're off. Close Midoriya's door and do not go in. I'll see you in a few hours."

The two men left. Holding his husband's hand Hizashi decided to be the first to break their silent atmosphere. Slowing his pace, he turned to look at his partner in the eyes. The morning sun's rays highlighted the small droplet of crimson blood on Shota's face, but Yamada quickly wiped it with his thumb.

"Hey Sho. What are we going to do now?"

" Honestly? I have no idea."