who's afraid of little old me? | mha x oc

chapter six

Hawks and I talked for a little more after that. It was awkward at first. I wasn't really used to conversations besides the ones I had in my head. Hawks did most of the talking though, I mostly just gave nods or answered yes or no.

Somethings however, I didn't know the answer to.

"So, Himari, what's your favorite candy?"

I had frowned. 

I remember eating candy, but it had been a really long time ago.

"I don't know."

Hawk's eyes widened, and he looked away for a second, "Ah, sorry."

Why was he apologizing?

He did nothing wrong.

It wasn't his fault.

It got quiet after that, and soon he left.

"I promise you'll get out of here," He had said.

---

True to his promise, exactly three days later I met with a psychiatrist. They had a quirk that allowed them to see read someone's emotions. They would see if I was irredeemable for society.

Hawks had brought me to her, "Meet my friend Akina Nakamura."

Akina was a short lady that looked as if she was in her forties of fifties. She gave me a sad smile, "I only feel anxiety coming from you, not even an ounce of hope. It's okay to be hopeful."

I didn't feel that nervous, or not anymore nervous than I usually am.

Had the mental hospital made me too broken for society.

Honestly, I wondered if this had damaged my sense of emotions. I couldn't remember that last time I felt true raw emotion.

"Let's sit down for this," Akina said, leading me to a sofa.

"I'm going to be asking a few questions, and I just want you to respond as truthfully as possible. Let me know if you want me to stop or if you need to take a second."

This sounded serious.

However, I nodded, "Okay."

Akina looked at her notes, wincing whenever she saw what she read.

"How did you feel about the deaths that you caused whenever the store incident first happened?"

"Like a monster."

It was a simple answer, but it was true. I had refused to let myself feel anything or let anyone be near me. One slip up, and someone could die. It had been a terrifying feeling, but I slowly, I learned to control it.

Akina nodded. I don't think she was really looking into the answer compared to how I reacted. She wouldn't get that much, but I assumed whatever she got was enough because she continued.

"What has it been like being in isolation for these past few years?"

"At first it was hard, but I got used to it quick."

I used to cry everyday, craving to escape the prison that I had been forced into. Howev

"How would you feel if I told you that you could leave right now? Would you feel ready?"

I paused. The thought alone made me nauseous. The thought was terrifyingly amazing.

"Yes."

The fire within me flickered, and I realized just how much I really wanted this.

No.

Just how much I needed this.

I waited the next question, but it never came.

Akina sat up, "That's all I needed to feel. You aren't dangerous Himari, you're just human, like the rest of us."

A single tear slid down my face.

I was getting out.

"But-" Akina said.

I paused.

What did she mean by but?

"You need some serious therapy."

a/n: guess who just won her track meet with a sprained ankle!!

btw I'm writing this in April rn and I have no idea when to publish so no I don't have track in the middle of summer

uhh me in may

im gonna be at the beach this week soo updates may not be until Monday, so this is the last one for a few days