WANT so BAD | minsung

forty one

As soon as Minho placed Jisung down on his bed, he took his time to stare at the younger's angelic face while he's sleeping, you can actually see his lips twitching and his eyebrows frowing. He missed the boy so much that he doesn't want to take his eyes away from him.

"I swear I could go home to this everyday and I won't get tired of it. Not even once" he whispered to himself and snuggled the sleeping Jisung.

He didn't even realize that the smaller's scent gave him enough comfort and now he's slowly drifting to slumber.

A few hours have passed, Minho opened his eyes just to witness a cold side of the bed. He was confused as to why Jisung left the bed without waking him up. Is he that tired? That he didn't feel the younger left his arms?

He stood up, opening his closet and started to undress himself to wear a new set of sweats. After doing so, he left the room and he looked over at Jisung's room but the door is closed. He doesn't know if he's being paranoid, but he could feel something weird behind that wall. He could feel a slight distance, but he brushed it off and jogged downstairs.

"Hyung we ordered food. Figured you need something immediately as soon as you wake up. Where's Ji?" when Felix asked that, he realized what he was feeling just now.

Behind that cold, gloomy door, was Jisung, isolating himself.

"I think he's inside his room. He didn't wake me up so I woke up on an empty bed" Minho sounded disappointed but he cannot let that get through him. Jisung is having a hard time and the least thing he wanted is an irrational boyfriend.

"You want me to check on him?" Felix asked but Minho just shakes his head, no.

"Give him time. My presence must be overwhelming for him especially if he's really having an episode. Let's just wait for him to get back. For now, I'll bring him to eat first" Minho stated and walked towards the kitchen to prepare the food.

After making his way upstairs, he knocked lightly on the door earning nothing but silence. As he turned the knob, he saw Jisung sitting on the couch, looking outside, whilst his feet are folded up to his chest.

"Baby? I brought you food" Minho muttered and Jisung looked on his way—expressionless. "Do you want to eat alone? I can just leave this here"

He was hoping that Jisung would say something. He wanted him to get excited now that he's back. He wants to hear whatever rant he has or whatever happened while he's gone, but he just received a stare. A stare which he could never read. A stare that seeks help, but will never be molded with words.

"Eat with me" Jisung replied and he was actually surprised that he's still trying even though he's not in the mood. Maybe he just wants companion so he decided to just sit there beside him, not saying anything.

Minho then helped him with the food which he gladly accepted. He just chewed and swallowed without saying anything, so the older stayed silent. He didn't want to push it and ask about what he feels, too scared Jisung would be disappointed.

"I'm sorry"

Minho then looked up at Jisung who is now on the verge of crying. He saw how desperate Jisung wants to say something, but he just couldn't. Now he just wants to hug him and tell him everything he wanted to hear.

"Don't be, my love. I'm here and I totally understand. Don't push yourself, because I'll be here for as long as you want" Minho assured the younger and now Jisung sobbed.

It's a feeling you wanted to let out, but you know there's no particular reason behind it. It feels like you just wanted to cry even though there's nothing really to cry about. You overthink things and hurt yourself to justify the sadness or even the loneliness you feel. Which is valid because sometimes we can't control when our emotions kicked in. We drown ourselves too much that it's really hard to swim up.