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WEST COAST - LANA DEL REY ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▯▯▯
Chapter twenty three
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Sad & horny.
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Am I a bad person?
Am I a bad person because I am afraid to get hurt?
Am I a bad person for not accepting his love?
As I sit here, grappling with the tumultuous whirlwind of emotions swirling inside me, I can't help but ponder the questions that haunt my every thought. Am I a bad person because I'm afraid to get hurt? Am I somehow defective for hesitating to accept Alessandro's love, despite his professed change?
The memories flood back like a relentless tide, each wave crashing against the fragile walls I've built around my heart. I remember the countless nights spent drowning in tears, the echoes of Alessandro's cruel words etched into the deepest recesses of my mind. He tore me apart, piece by agonizing piece, leaving nothing but shattered fragments of the person I once was.
Yet, despite the pain he inflicted, I found myself inexplicably drawn to him. His words held a mesmerizing allure, weaving a tangled web of promises and apologies that ensnared my weary heart. And when he confessed his love, a flicker of hope ignited within me, illuminating the darkness that had engulfed my soul for so long.
But alongside that hope, there was fear. Fear of reliving the agony of betrayal. Fear of once again surrendering my heart to someone who may only break it anew. Fear of allowing myself to be vulnerable in a world that seemed determined to crush me at every turn.
I long to believe that Alessandro has truly changed and that his love is genuine and pure. But the scars of his past deeds run too deep, carving a jagged path of distrust and apprehension that I struggle to navigate. How can I be expected to simply forgive and forget, to relinquish the walls I've erected to shield myself from further pain?
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I sat on the edge of her bed, my arms wrapped around Asteria, who was sobbing uncontrollably into my shoulder. The news of Asteria's infertility had hit me like a tidal wave, leaving both me and Nora grappling with a mix of shock, sadness, and uncertainty. I gently stroked Asteria's hair, offering what comfort I could as my own heart ached with empathy.
We wanted to have just a chill night with each other but it turned into Asteria confessing which led us to this situation right now
Nora, sat beside her, her eyes filled with concern and empathy. "Asteria, sweetheart, we're here for you," I murmured, reaching out to grasp Asteria's hand.
