I Love You, It's Ruining My Life | Lovertation Taylor Swift Fanfic |

Chapter 20

TW: rape (let's js ignore the fact that most of these chapters should probably have some type of trigger warning but don't 😅)

🖤Rep🖤
Fuck fuck fuck. Please be a dream. That did not just happen.

I looked at the time. 6:07 am.

I looked down at the blood-soaked sheets under me. The blanket that I used just hours ago to sleep with, now thrown on the floor. My wrists with red imprints from where he grabbed me to make sure I didn't move. My jaw sore from having a blanket stuffed in it to muffle my screams. His voice ringing again and again in my head. "no one will believe you. Tell anyone, and I'll do it again."

Expecting it to be an hour later, I looked at the time again. 6:08.

I called Lover again.

"Love will you be here soon?"

"I'll be there in less than two minutes. I'm sorry, I'm going as fast as I can. Just breathe for me, okay?"

"Can you stay on the phone with me?"

"Of course baby."

The next minute was pure silence, but it made me feel slightly better knowing she was there.

I couldn't stop replaying it in my head. The confusion I felt when he walked in. The worry when he started to approach me. Worry turned to scared when he locked the door, then to absolute terror when he stripped both of us down. 27 excruciating minutes of screaming with no sound coming out. My parents have abused me all my life, and I've never been more terrified than now.

My dad raped me multiple times through my childhood, but this was somehow worse. I felt safe here. My dad was a bad person, but Tyler wasn't. Or at least, I didn't think he was. I never thought anything bad would happen to me here. But here I am, sitting in a puddle of my own blood, waiting in silence before the chaos starts.

I felt my breath start to get heavy, the lump in my throat not going away. I can't cry though. I can't. I never cry. Crying is for the weak. I can't show emotion. Nobody gives a fuck about whether or not I'm upset. Don't be a baby. Don't cry.

Lover must have noticed me start to breathe heavily, because she broke the silence by asking me if I was okay.

"No I'm not fucking okay"

"Okay, that was a stupid question. My bad, sorry. Just try to take deep breaths. I'm turning onto our street right now."

"How are you driving? Your car is in the driveway."

"1989 let me take hers."

"How's she gonna get to school?"

"Her house is only a couple blocks away from ours, she said she was okay with walking here to get her car."

"She didn't have to-"

"Don't worry about her. She assured me it was fine, I needed to get to you as soon as possible."

We sat there in silence for a few more moments, then Lover broke the awkward silence again.