Author's Note: CW for... not homophobia (it's Snapephobia) but Remus thinks it is homophobia. Also panicking, and unintentional self harm.
Also in this chapter they do something awful to Snape. Now, while they're stupid kids who do stupid things they shouldn't, I want to make sure y'all know I'm not condoning or glorifying this sort of behavior.
*
"Shhh!"
"I didn't say anything."
"You did now."
"SHH!"
James, Sirius, and Remus were outside one of the dorms for the third year Slytherin boys. It was the middle of the night, and Remus thought he was going to die. This was too risky. Far too risky. He told them many times it was too risky, and neither of them cared. He initially didn't want to join them but James pressured him into doing it, and now here he was... out of bed in the middle of the night and in the Slytherin dorms. Lucky Peter got to be the one to stay in the Gryffindor common room to let them back in.
If we get caught here we might be expelled, he thought as James cautiously opened the door. They were hunched under the invisibility cloak but there were so many possibilities of getting caught! He never should have agreed. He should have just let James and Sirius do it, and let them get expelled.
They slid into the dorm room, listening to the quiet breathing of four boys. All beds had their curtains open and Remus couldn't help but glance at Aegis as they passed his bed. He was a bit like James when he slept, it seemed; arms flung every which way, the blanket a bit tangled around his legs. Snape was a back sleeper. One hand was curled up against his chest and the other was resting over the blanket. His mouth hung slightly open and a bit of drool was coming out. Disgusting, but strangely peaceful. He looked so small and innocent that Remus wished they weren't getting any sort of revenge.
Especially such a risky one!
And with no proof!
I don't want to do this! he thought, chewing his bottom lip as James pulled the little cylinder out from his pocket. It looked a little bit like a mini rocket and even had a string coming out, but it wasn't one you lit. James adjusted the cloak so he could lean down with the cylinder close to Snape's face and he tugged the string. A puff of blue smoke wafted out, settling over Snape's face. James withdrew his hands and they all stepped back a bit, in case he woke up. Remus held his breath when Snape's eyes did flutter open... but then he closed them, rolled over, and began snoring softly.
Sirius then reached out from under the cloak and poked Snape. Nothing. He poked harder and then gave his arm a tug. Snape remained asleep. James grinned and elbowed Remus. His turn. Bloody hell. James held up the cloak so Remus could reach down and awkwardly pick Snape up. He buckled slightly under the sudden weight then shifted Snape over his shoulder, thinking about ways he could instead murder his friends.
With Snape under the cloak they didn't have the space, and it was Sirius taking the risk not being invisible. He stayed in the shadows as James helped Remus carry Snape out of the dorm room... and then out of the common room without any problem whatsoever. Nobody saw them, and Snape remained in his deep, magicked sleep.
It was Monday night—or rather, Tuesday morning. James and Sirius had spent the past thirty or so hours figuring out a great revenge for Snape, and when James's delivery from one of the prank places arrived with a box of Sleep Puffs, they decided on what to do then and there. It took James the entire day to wheedle Remus into agreeing, since they needed him and his strength. Eventually Remus gave in, mostly because, as always, he didn't want to disappoint his friends. He did lecture them at great length on the risks, which they were well aware of. After Astronomy the Marauders had stayed in the common room, telling David and Spinnet none of them were sleepy enough to go to bed yet. At three-thirty, James, Sirius, and Remus left. Whenever Remus was sure they were alone, he'd remind them that this was stupid. And now here they were... hauling Snape through the school.
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