Four To The End (prev Shifting Lines) Book Three (Marauders Era)

Untitled Part 147

What just happened?

Remus's chest hurt as if it had been clawed open, and he pressed his hand to it, trying to breathe. It was hard to breathe. Very hard. Actually, it was hard to do anything. There was a tingly sort of ache filling him from head to toe, and, after a second, he couldn't bear it any longer and sank down to the ground, just sitting there on the stone.

It was probably better than falling backwards.

Although falling off that wardrobe and smashing his skull open made more sense than... whatever that was that just happened, which—which he really wasn't sure about.

His lips felt like they were on fire and slowly he brought his fingertips up to touch them. They were warm and trembling slightly. It also hurt to touch them as if they were bruised, which they weren't because they'd be healed quick enough that... it shouldn't hurt anymore. So the pain wasn't really there. It just felt like it was. Or maybe he wanted them to be painful because of how his heart felt.

There was a sort of choking, wheezing sound that he realized came from himself, and then he lay down flat on the floor. It almost seemed like the air itself was too heavy. Or too light. Either he'd be squashed into nothing or float away into the clouds. Everything was dizzying and he had no clue where he was.

He touched his lips again, just enough so his fingertips were like a whisper across where Jean-Marie's lips had been a moment ago. Another sound emerged from him, this one more like a sigh than anything else. Part of him wanted to press his whole hand to his mouth, to push that feeling inside of him, to devour it—yet another part didn't want to touch it at all, and he was reminded of in their first year when that girl had kissed Peter's finger and he said he'd never wash it again.

That... finally made sense to Remus.

I just got kissed.

He bolted upright, gasping loudly and then trying to get air into his lungs. It took a moment of struggling to do so, and then he grabbed the desk to pull himself to his feet.

I JUST GOT KISSED?

On the lips.

By a boy.

Not James kissing his cheek.

Not Lily kissing his lips.

A boy—

a Gay boy

—kissing him.

He wanted to cover his mouth in shock but again, did not want to smudge the feeling on his lips. So instead he cupped his hand around his mouth, making sure to keep any traces of Jean-Marie on them—

Merlin, what am I doing?!

He sat down in one of the chairs, putting his head in his hands and trying to get his brain to focus. Trying to wrap his brain around what occurred—trying to get his brain to accept what occurred was real. That Jean-Marie... was... gay... and kissed him. Kissed him. On the lips, a real, proper kiss that—

Jean-Marie...?

Remus straightened up, blinking at the door before getting to his feet, hardly noticing what he was doing as he took lurching steps forward. His brain remained in the classroom while his body moved on its own, hurrying down the corridor, down the stairs, down to the entrance hall, and out the front doors.

The carriage was gone.

Jean-Marie was gone.

Remus stood on the front steps, staring down the path that wound its way down towards the forest. He was dimly aware of other students around, some of them watching him with curiosity. As their stares penetrated the fog in his head, he slowly began to grow red, terrified they could somehow see on him what happened. Terrified that his lips were stained with Jean-Marie's kiss.