Fanfic Short Stories

White Collar: Not Fake Dating

Summary: Clinton Jones is in a serious relationship and everyone on the team thinks it's a joke. Oh, I wonder who could be to blame for misleading the team? Neal, I'm looking at you!

A/N: Inspired by a Tumblr reverse tropes prompt: no one believes we're dating

FBI Agent Clinton Jones is about to leave the prosecuting attorney's office, when she says, "One more thing."

Jones sits back down. "Sure, what is it?"

"I'm getting a vibe." Helena Beauchamp holds his gaze. "I can't act on it, not when we're working this case together. But when that's over..." She shrugs. "Well, if we're both still single, I'd be interested."

"Yeah," Jones says. "I'd be interested, too."

But this is the culmination of the biggest, most complex case he's ever led, and now that it's going to trial, it's likely to be months – maybe even a year – of needing their relationship to be strictly business.

It's a pleasant surprise a few weeks later when the defendant agrees to a plea deal. When the bad guy goes to jail, Jones takes Helena out to dinner to celebrate. She was right about the vibe. They keep dating.

And he mentions it sometimes at work. He tells the team he's meeting Helena for lunch or dinner. His colleagues at the Bureau nod and say, "Nice!"

Later he drops comments about taking a weekend trip together. About meeting her sister. About taking her to meet his parents. And his colleagues grin and congratulate him.

Then one day, at the end of a team briefing, Peter Burke says, "One more thing."

Everyone waits, wondering what's up, because the boss sounds very serious.

"Over the last eight months, we've been joking about the time Agent Jones spends with prosecuting attorney Beauchamp on the Castleman case. I know it's funny when we make it sound like they're dating, and the meeting-the-parents comment last week had us all cracking up, but I'm worried we're crossing a line. We shouldn't joke about something like that." Peter looks at his team, meeting each person's eyes before saying, "Now let's get to work."

Jones is so shocked that he doesn't say anything. He just stands up as everyone starts to head back to their desks. "Peter..." he says. "I... I wasn't..."

Peter pats his shoulder. "It's okay. I know you would never do something so blatantly against the rules. I should have put a stop to the jokes earlier, it's just... Well, you're so very serious that it was good to see you kidding around with the team." And then Peter walks away before Jones can respond.

He knows he told Peter that the Castleman case was closed. He put it in his weekly report ages ago. And while the boss is often busy and distracted, he doesn't miss details like that.

Jones walks to his desk, but he doesn't sit down. Instead, he looks around the room. All of these people really thought his comments about dating Helena were just... just... committing to the bit?

He notices that Neal Caffrey looks sheepish. Jones strides over to his desk. "Caffrey. You have something you want to tell me?"

Their consultant nods, and they head to a conference room away from the rest of the team.

"Start talking," Jones orders as he closes the door.

It's Caffrey, so of course it's long and convoluted. Something about the evidence in the Castleman case including a forgery. Specifically, an item Neal had forged before he'd started working for the FBI. As long as the case remains open, the evidence remains in custody, and Neal has access to swap it out with the original before anyone notices. Anyone like, say, Neal's girlfriend who works for the company that insures the item.

"It's taken you eight months?" Jones asks.

"Oh, no," Neal assures him. "It only took a couple of weeks."

"Then why didn't you let the case close?"

"Well, firstly, it's much easier to remove something from your status report than it is to add something in. But more importantly..." And here Neal pauses to flash his infamous smile. "The bit about you dating Helena was just too fun."

"It wasn't a bit!" Jones protests. "We're going shopping for engagement rings this weekend."

"Congratulations!" Neal says, his voice full of the earnestness he learned as a con artist. "Imagine how surprised everyone's going to be when they get the wedding invitations. It's going to be epic!"

And maybe being in love has softened Jones. Because instead of yelling at Neal, he simply laughs. "Yeah, that is going to be epic."

A/N: I was completely winging it when it comes to prosecuting attorneys, the time frames for prosecuting a case, etc. Just go with it and embrace the whimsy!

Helena is based on a character Silbrith created. Thanks for letting me borrow her!