Only yours

In the Grip of Uncertainty

During the drive, I had that image in my mind the entire time. I disliked seeing her in the arms of another man. Suddenly, I felt an urgent need to hit something. I needed to get that under control before boarding the jet. Massaru stopped at the long driveway and signaled that he would wait. I hurried up the steps.

I rang the bell until the door finally opened. Then I rushed past the employee, up the grand staircase, straight to Kunzite's office. I knew it wouldn't be long before he joined me. I confidently opened his minibar and took a large swig straight from the bottle. Was Kunzite really right? Did I truly love her? Was that the tearing feeling inside me when I saw the picture of her with that guy?

If love felt like this, I could do without it. I tried to numb it with another gulp of alcohol.

When the door opened, I caught a glimpse of Kaori, but she was quickly sent away by Kunzite. Thank goodness; she would only ask annoying questions and give unqualified advice. Kunzite approached me, took the bottle from my hand, filled two glasses, and handed one to me. We sat in the armchairs and were silent for a while.

"You might have been right," I finally broke the silence. Kunzite smiled at me. "I like to hear that. But about what exactly?" "Oh, come on, as if you couldn't guess. Usagi."

His grin widened. "Well, that didn't take as long as expected. So why the gloomy mood? Shouldn't you be having some fun with her?"

I got up and paced back and forth. I needed to sort through these unfamiliar feelings somehow. "First, I should already be on my way to Brazil. There was a fire, and Father ordered me to be there in person," I paused briefly and ran my hand through my hair. "And second, I don't know if Usagi..."

"Whether Usagi what?"

I fell back into the armchair. "I was in her apartment for the first time today... You remember me telling you about that guy I noticed at the art exhibition?" Kunzite nodded and sipped his drink. "In her living room, there was a photo. He was holding her in his arms, and she was looking up at him. A typical cozy picture... you know what I mean," I said curtly, emptying my glass only to refill it again.

Kunzite pursed his lips. "Maybe he's her ex?" "Why would that picture still be there?" "There's surely a harmless explanation. They must still be friends, or did she maybe hook up with him at the exhibition?"

I shook my head and had to smile; she only hooked up with me.

That guy had approached her; they chatted and then leaned against the railing. As soon as the other woman joined, Usagi distanced herself from him. Was that a good sign?

We leaned back and continued drinking in silence. I kept thinking about the evening of the art exhibition and the picture from her room, trying to find a logical connection. No matter how I turned it, it made no sense in my head.

Eventually, Kunzite stood up. "If she means more to you, you need to show her, and you'd best not wait too long. I'll check on my wife. You know where everything is."

I nodded briefly and swirled the whiskey in my glass, lost in thought. Usagi, what are you doing to me? I weighed whether I should really talk to her about it. But I decided against it. I already had enough on my plate with Saphir and my father's additional appointments. Besides, I needed information about that mysterious guy.

I decided to assign Massaru to find out who the guy was, to learn who I was dealing with. I utterly detested the uncertainty spreading within me. The large clock showed already 4 AM. Maybe I should board the jet now and sleep during the flight to make good use of the time. In Brazil, many tasks awaited me, which would hopefully distract my thoughts from Usagi. I hoped that my feelings would normalize by the time I returned to Japan.