Claustrophobic Mind

Chapter 30

"It's not good," the doctor sighed.

Mike just about fell to the floor right then and there. He felt weak, still unable to except that any of this happened. He secretly hoped for it to be a dream.

"So he's alive?" Mike questioned, the doctor's hand still on his shoulder.

The man sighed and took his hand away from Mike. Mike was disappointed at the reaction, but waited impatiently for the answer.

"Let's talk back here. We'll have a little more privacy," the doctor trailed off.

Mike anxiously nodded as the doctor turned to lead him down a long corridor. The open doors as they passed by revealed dozens of patients hooked up to lifelines. Mike shivered at how unsettling the hospital made him feel. He wondered if Billie Joe was laced up with a heart rate monitor too.

They turned a corner into a less busy hallway by a set of large closed doors no one seemed to be using, which must have been why the doctor took him there. What ever the man was going to tell him, it wasn't for anyone else's ears.

"I-Is Billie alive or not?!" Mike shouted, basically making their efforts for privacy pointless.

"Barely," the doctor sighed.

Mike had to put both hands on the wall next to them and pushed all his body weight against it. It was such a relief to hear that Billie was alive. Even if he wasn't okay, he's still alive.

"What do you mean by that?"

"What I mean is that he is in terribly bad health. He has a huge risk of dying. The overdose didn't do anything but make things worse for him. We had to pump his stomach in order to get the medication out before it went through his system, but...the damage has already been done," the doctor explained.

Mike's head snapped up at this.

"What damage?" Mike panicked.

The doctor looked away and readjusted his clipboard before he spoke again. He looked like he was stalling.

"He is very weak from this experience. Even weaker than before the attempt. It will take him a while to regain that strength," the man spoke shamefully.

Mike huffed and rubbed his hands over his face. The whole situation was too stressful for him to handle. He ran his hands through his hair as a way to calm his nerves.

"How...How close was he to dying?" Mike whispered. Just from saying that he teared up. He couldn't imagine life without Billie.

"Very, very close. It's a miracle that he...lived."

Mike tried to hold it back, but couldn't help but let out a few tears. He was the one that had let Billie Joe get this close to death. He was the one who put him over the edge. He was supposed to be the one...who cared.

"So, he is the man that attempted the murder of Frank Edwin-"

"He can't go to jail! No, no it's not his fault. You don't understand. He's mentally ill. There's no way that he could be put in a prison. He needs a psychiatric hospital. Billie Joe isn't mentally...okay," Mike ranted before the doctor could finish.

"We know this. We also know that the man he stabbed requested that no charges were to be pressed against Mr. Armstrong. I was going to suggest that we send him to a psychiatric hospital for treatment on the suicide attempt and his mental stability."

Mike let out a sigh of great relief before he burst into tears. He feel down to his knees and sat on the hard hospital floor. It lifted so much weight off his shoulders to hear that they weren't putting Billie Joe in prison. He was expecting them to think that he was as crazy as Billie if he asked them to check him into a psychiatric hospital.

He sobbed as he sat on his knees. The doctor couldn't do anything but watch. Mike didn't know if he felt sympathy, or if he's seen this a million times, but he couldn't care less. All that mattered was knowing that Billie was going to get the help that he desperately needed.

The doctor laid a hand on Mike's shoulder as a pity filled gesture. Mike shook from tears and fear under his touch.

"Mr. Armstrong is in room 129 if you would like to pay him a visit. He isn't conscious, but he should be by morning," the doctor said before parting Mike on the back.

Mike nodded, but couldn't silence his cries in order to speak. The man walked away from Mike as he continued to lay on the cold floor.

Finally bringing himself to his senses, Mike slowly rose from the position and started to shakily walk around the corner. The hallways continued to be busy, despite the fact that it was 12:00 at night.

Mike just about limped in pity as he looked for Billie's room number. 125, 126, 127, 128, and finally 129. The door was closed. Mike knew this was never a good sign when it came to hospitals.

He laid his hand on the doorknob. Mike didn't open the door immediately. Instead, he paused for a second. He didn't know what to prepare himself for. He didn't know what to blame himself for. He didn't know what Billie would think when he woke up. Would he be mad at Mike for not letting him have his 'peace'?

Mike shook his head quickly at the thought. No, of course he wouldn't be mad. He should be appreciative that Mike saved his life, shouldn't he?

Finally building up the courage, Mike pushed on the doorknob to Billie Joe's room. The room was dark, probably so it would be easier for him to sleep. Mike immediately smelled the harsh sent of sanitizer.

Once he got the door open all the way, Mike decided to look for Billie before he stepped in. His small body immediately caught Mike's eye as he trailed over the bed.

"Oh Billie," Mike whispered in pain.

He shut the door before he started to make his way into the room. Mike kept a close eye on Billie Joe while he made his way over.

Mike sat down in the chair next to Billie's bed before he really looked him over. Billie Joe was more pale than usual, to the point where he almost unrecognizable. He looked bony in the papery hospital gown. Mike couldn't tell how much weight he lost through his baggy clothes that were too big for him. An oxygen mask was laid over his face in order to keep him breathing. Mike prayed that the pills hadn't effected his lungs or heart. Billie's arms rested beside him, one punctured with an IV.

His body was laid out as he was positioned on his back. Mike didn't like seeing him sleep like that. It felt strange not seeing Billie Joe curled up in a ball like he always did as he slept. Billie's hair shagged off to the side as he slept; the only thing on his body that didn't look pale or damaged.

Mike looked over at the arm the Billie Joe burnt himself with cigarettes on. The nurses seemed to have noticed it, considering it was rebandaged. A few tears left Mike's eyes as he saw this. He felt guilty for not stopping the self harm that Billie was committing. Billie Joe was getting better, so Mike didn't think he had to pay much attention to his negative actions.

It hurt Mike so much to see Billie like this. He took Billie Joe's hand in his and gave it a squeeze. It was more to reassure himself rather than Billie.

The heart rate monitor beeped repeatedly, but Mike found it comforting. It was comforting to know that Billie Joe was a live. Not well, but alive.

Mike settled back into the chair with Billie's hand still in his. He didn't let anymore tears fall, for he remembered what Billie had told him the night he was raped.

Pity doesn't do much for the world.