Claustrophobic Mind

Chapter 40

"I'm sorry, sir. There're no overnight stays in the therapeutic unit," the doctor sighed to a pleading Mike. She was the same one that takes Billie to all his sessions.

"I can't leave him. He's become extremely reliant on me throughout the day," Mike begged as he leaned against a nearby wall.

The doctor's brown eyes flicked away from Mike as she didn't feel like convincing him any further. Mike didn't want to budge, but he knew he shouldn't disrespect the hospital's policies. Instead, he finally gave in.

"Can I at least stay with him until he goes to sleep?" Mike asked sympathetically.

The doctor hesitated and eyed Mike suspiciously. She knew Mike shouldn't stay past visiting hours, but she had grown a close bond with her silent patient, and she couldn't bare to see him anymore upset.

"Only for a while. Up to another hour at the minimum," she warned as she looked around for anyone who possibly heard her.

Mike sighed in relief. He uncrossed his arms and pinched his nose slightly. He couldn't believe she was letting him do this.

"Thank you so much. I really appreciate this," Mike spoke as he looked the doctor in the eye.

The doctor nodded and turned away acting like she "didn't" see Mike go back into Billie Joe's room. Mike smiled slightly and stepped back into the cold environment.

When Mike stepped through the door frame, he saw Billie in the back corner tapping something on the wall. As Billie Joe heard the door open, he looked up to see Mike.

His expression immediately lit up seeing his best friend. He thought that visiting hours were over. Billie shrugged this off as he ran over to Mike, abandoning the piece of paper that he had attached to the white walls.

Billie Joe pulled Mike in for a hug and sighed heavily. Mike smiled.

"I thought you were leaving," Billie spoke, still holding Mike.

"They let me stay," Mike responded. He decided not to tell Billie Joe that he was leaving. He didn't want him to worry.

Billie smiled against Mike's chest. He felt grateful that they had let Mike stay longer than he should've. That just meant more time with his best friend.

"I'm glad they did," Billie Joe mumbled, sounding exhausted and tired.

"Me too, Bill," Mike said back. He patted Billie's back a few times.

Suddenly, Billie Joe perked up in Mike's arms. He lifted his head up so that he could look Mike in the eyes. Mike smiled at Billie. Billie smiled at Mike.

"I want to show you something, Mikey," Billie Joe whispered.

"Okay, but after that we should go to bed," Mike offered.

Billie nodded. He was feeling pretty tired.

Mike let Billie Joe go as he started to pull away. Billie glanced over at the paper he tapped on the wall. Before walking over, Billie turned around and reached for Mike's hand. It was warm in his. With that, he guided Mike over to the destination. Mike smiled at Billie's excitement.

When Mike got there he looked at the paper to find that it was a drawing. It looked to be a man playing the guitar with fans cheering him on.

"I drew this," Billie Joe said shyly.

Mike waited.

"It's a picture of me playing in Green Day again. W-When I get better. When e-everything is okay again," Billie stuttered.

Mike squeezed Billie's hand tightly.

"I can't wait until it comes true..." Billie Joe whispered as he closed his eyes, causing a tear to trail down his face.

Mike noticed this and let go of Billie's hand. He put both hands on either side of Billie's face and looked him seriously in the eyes. Billie Joe kept is gaze towards the floor.

"And it will come true, baby doll. This picture will come to life before you know it. Fans will be cheering you on just like they always have...and you'll be amazing just as you always are. I'm so proud of you," Mike assured.

Billie Joe nodded and pulled Mike in for a hug. He was glad that Mike was finally there to get him through the tough times of his recovery. What would he do without him?

"You have no idea how much those words mean to me, Mike," Billie said as he felt his self esteem strengthen.

Mike squeezed Billie Joe tighter in the hug and then patted him on the back before pulling away.

"Let's get to bed," Mike sighed.

Instead of having Billie make his way over to the bed at an extremely slow pace, Mike swooped him off his feet and carried him to the bed himself. He wanted to make sure Billie Joe was asleep before his hour was up.

When Mike sat Billie down gently on the bed, he realized how trapped Billie must feel. Mike could leave the hospital whenever he wanted, but Billie Joe was forced to stay there until he recovered. Mike couldn't imagine.

"Mikey?"

"Huh?" Mike asked as he was snapped out of his thoughts. He didn't even hear Billie taking to him.

"I said you don't have to carry me over to the bed anymore. There's enough self pity already flouting around me," Billie Joe confessed.

Mike sighed and sat on the bed next to Billie. Billie looked away. He didn't want to cry. He didn't want pity. He didn't want sympathy. Pity doesn't do much for the world.

"Billie."

Billie Joe looked at Mike although before hand he wouldn't dare.

"It's okay, you know?" Mike spoke softly.

"What's okay?" Billie asked. The only thing breaking the silence was the humming air conditioner.

"It's okay to feel sorry for yourself."

Billie Joe shut his eyes and took in a deep breath, analyzing the words Mike said to him. Is it okay? No, it can't be.

"Yeah, there are people around the world that have it worse, but that doesn't make your situation any less important. Everyone deserves to feel bad for themselves at least once in their life. When other people bash you about self pitying, don't listen to them. There's nothing wrong with the natural feelings you have towards something. Don't try to push them away, or else you'll end up like the dishonest cowards that dare to walk the face of the earth."

Billie opened his eyes and smiled at Mike's words. Mike smiled back. It amazes Billie Joe how easily inspirational words leave Mike's mouth to make such meaningful sentences.

"Goodnight, Mikey."

"Goodnight, Billie Joe."

Billie easily fell asleep with Mike by his side. Although Billie Joe thought that Mike was staying with him all night, Mike didn't lay beside him in the bed. He thought it would be too risky in case he woke Billie up as he left.

Instead he watched Billie sleep. It wasn't until Mike saw Billie Joe breathing in and out deeply in his comfortable sleep did Mike dare to leave his side. Billie only had one thing on his mind as his body drifted off to paradise.

Pity does a lot for the world.