Claustrophobic Mind

Chapter 15

Mike felt as though fifty pounds was just added onto his body. He didn't know if it was from relaxation or fear. This could not be happening. Mike spoke again.

"Bill?" Mike said, hesitating. He continued to make his way over.

Billie Joe began to try and move himself further away from Mike again. The frightened look in his eyes was enough to make Mike freeze in his tracks.

"Billie? It's me..." Mike said starting to tear up. Seeing his friend in this state was something he never thought would happen.

Tears spilled out of Billie's eyes. They quickly left wet tracks down his cheeks. A shiver went up his spine. Mike figured that Billie Joe wasn't going to respond. That was until Billie whispered.

"Fink?" Billie asked looking hopeful.

Mike couldn't help but question who the hell Fink was.

"No. It's me buddy. It's Mike," Mike said as he took that as an okay to move closer to Billie Joe.

Billie began to shake out of what seemed to be fear. He began silently crying again. The tears ran down his face. The cuts on his face continued to bleed. Streaks of tears and blood trailed down his cheeks.

"Wow, you got cut up pretty bad. What the fuck happened?" Mike said quickly making his way over to Billie. That was probably not a good idea.

Billie Joe flinched from Mike's movement. He began to sob out of pure fright. Mike didn't take the time to consider this before he came over and put his hands on Billie's shoulders.

This made Billie snap his head up and gasp in a harsh breath that silenced his tears. He looked at Mike with wide eyes while biting his lip.

"Are you alright, Billie Joe?"

Billie's shaking increased by the millions. His body shook so much that his handcuffs raddled against the brick wall behind him. This made Mike glance down at his wrists, but not think anything of it. Billie Joe started to breathe quicker and quicker until his inhales were uneven and short. He looked like it was a struggle to even breathe what so ever. Billie looked like he was choking on air. Sweat poured down the sides of his face. Mike could feel Billie Joe's heart rate increase just by looking at him.

Mike knew right then and there, Billie was having a panic attack.

"Hey, calm down Bill. It's okay. You're okay," Mike soothed.

This had no effect on Billie Joe. If anything, it made it worse. His trembling body began to feel weak under Mike's grasp. Billie suddenly pulled his hand up to his mouth and started nervously biting his nails. Mike knew that he always did this during his worst attacks.

"Billie Joe? Come on buddy, you gotta breathe. You're freaking yourself out."

Billie hitched in short breaths in an attempt to keep breathing. It looked as though his lungs were the size of a pea.

"Come on Bill. You're okay, you're okay. You're just having a panic attack," Mike said trying to meet Billie's gaze.

Billie Joe pulled his hands away from his mouth so quickly it looked like he was burned. He frowned his eyebrows and stared down at his hands. They trembled furiously and nonstop. Billie began shaking his head back and forth rapidly. His fingers bent into weird shapes as this continued.

Mike automatically knew what was happening. Billie Joe has told him before that during his panics, his hands begin to feel numb.

"Hey, Billie? Listen to me. Your hands are fine. You're going to be okay. Everything is okay," Mike said.

He took Billie Joe's hand and began to rub the back of Billie's hand with his thumb. Billie pulled his hand away from Mike in a fearful manner. This confused Mike. Billie Joe would always ask to hold Mike's hand during his attacks. He said it helped him having Mike there.

Mike lifted his gaze up to Billie's face. It glistened in the moonlight because of all the sweat sitting on his skin. He saw Billie Joe roll his eyes back while his eyelids drooped. Mike knew Billie was starting to feel the dizziness.

"Hey. Just breathe Bill. You're making this worse for yourself."

Billie continued to gasp for air at uneven rates. His body continued to tremble and his tears continued to fall.

Mike suddenly took Billie Joe's face into his hands. With both hands resting on either side of Billie's soft features, Mike looked into his eyes. The green had darkened and was washed out by the redness around his pupil. His eyes were glossy and almost doll like in Mike's gaze. They were filled with confusion and fear.

"Look at me Billie Joe. You're going to be fine. You just need to breathe. You'll get through this, I know you will," Mike said. The tone in his voice was deafeningly serious.

Billie looked back at Mike halfheartedly. Suddenly he began gagging. His body convulsed while he looked like he was going to be sick at any moment. The gagging got worse, and he started to shift his body weight uncomfortably.

"Billie. I need you to calm down. You're having a really bad attack. Trust me, you're not going to throw up. It's just the nausea," Mike assured.

Mike couldn't help but tear up at his friends reaction to the panic attack. This might be his worse on yet. He's had plenty growing up, Mike had come to notice, but none were this bad.

Instinctively, Mike moved his hands to Billie's hair and started to run his fingers through the locks. His hair felt filthy under Mike's hands, but Mike couldn't care any less. The only thing he cared about in that moment was getting his friend out of his attack. It was easy to tell that Billie Joe relaxed a little under this gesture. Mike was making him feel comfortable.

"See? You're okay buddy," Mike whispered.

Billie's eyes lifted up to Mike's. His dull look showed confusion and fear. Mike knew that Billie was so out of it, that he didn't know who Mike was.

"It's me, Bill. It's Mike."

The look in Billie's face changed in an instant. His features relaxed while some of his panic remained.

"Mikey?" Billie croaked.

Mike broke down. He pulled Billie Joe's head to his shoulder and cradled him. Mike rested his head against Billie's and sobbed profusely. The tears that were held in for days began to leave from his eyes with no warning. Although the dirtiness of Billie Joe's hair was unmistakable, Mike could still smell the natural scent of Billie in his arms. He took in deep breaths while kissing his head over and over. It was such a relief to hear Billie say Mike's name. For a second there, Mike thought he lost him forever.

He pulled Billie Joe away from his shoulder and looked into his eyes.

"Yes. Yes, it's me. I'm here Billie," Mike said and wiped away Billie Joe's tears.

Billie flinched at the pain caused by his bruises and cut on his face. Mike still doesn't know how they got there.

But none of that mattered. After days of the police searching for Billie, Mike found him. He didn't care if what he did to Tré was absolutely mental. He only cared that he had Billie Joe again. Right here, in his arms.

For a few short moments, he had Billie back.