Valor

Chapter 66

*I'm not traveling anymore so chapters will probably be updated daily!! We're getting to the endish here guys!! It's all gonna go crazy!! Sorry for not updating a lot, but I promise I will be now dw 

I wake up to cold sheets. Since living with the Valors I've been accustomed to waking up wrapped in at least one of them, which makes this morning automatically feel worse.

I never took myself for someone who would crave physical touch. I've always enjoyed staying away from things like that, but it was almost like a lever flipped in my head when I met them. At every turn I felt myself falling closer and closer into them until their lack of touch left me depressed and alone.

I turn over onto my back with a groan. I had to crash early last night. Every part of my body ached like I'd been hit by a train and I wanted to crack it all up to training too hard outside with Onyx, but I had never been this sore in my entire life. Maybe it's the addition of the crazy sex I've been having. I have been jumping the guys like crazy every chance I get.

My mind drifts off as I think back to the past few days.

The brothers got in an argument and normally I wouldn't intervene because they work their shit out themselves, and this time was no different, but I couldn't help but sit on the top step of the stairs and listen.

I had suddenly reverted back to a seven year old listening to my parents fighting, and just like then I felt real guilt.

Back then, my mom and dad used to argue about how to pay for the extra expenses that came with having a kid and I couldn't help but feel guilty that I'd been born. My parents never wanted kids. Both Sarah and I had been accidents–my parents had said that often when they didn't think I heard. It didn't really hurt me. Having a kid when you're living in poverty isn't all that great.

Sitting on that stair listening to the brothers argue, I couldn't help but feel responsible; just like I did then.

I couldn't make out all the words, only the tone and it was more than enough to know that they were frustrated and angry.

At first I was going to storm down there and demand them to tell me what was going on, but then I heard someone snarl my name and it made my feet feel like they were glued to the wood.

Was I responsible for the argument? Was I the cause of these problems between the men? I knew as soon as they came to rescue me from Marco's cabin that they had been blaming Maverick for all the bullshit of letting me get captured, and no matter how many times I told them it wasn's his fault, they still looked at him like a traitor.

Is that why they're mad now? Has it all finally caught up with us?

I sit up in the bed and scrub my hands over my eyes, trying to rid the remnants of sleep that seem to cling to my body these days.

It's a little past noon and I mentally scold myself for letting it get so late.

I think a part of me has dreaded getting up and facing the brothers who act like everything is ok. They thought I was fast asleep; perhaps that's why they had that fight. They waited until I was tucked away to air our their dirty laundry.

Obviously I wasn't supposed to hear and them acting like nothing is wrong is making it worse.

Not only that, but I've noticed slight changes in all the brothers since that night. Normally Kai is more reserved around Mav and Onyx as if he doesn't feel like he can show his real feelings that I know have been eating away at his soul since he was a child.

Since the fight, he's let his walls down which confuse me. How can one day change years of hiding? Dame has been even happier lately—the feeling of having all his brothers getting along suddenly gives him the real family he's been missing.