Don't Wanna Love

22. Alessandro loves ??

Alessandro

I have been avoiding Soph since that day. It was intentional and I was rude to her as well, for I want her to move on and marry Leo, my buddy who seemed quite smitten with her.

That's what is best for her. I can't offer her love, though I love her, I can't offer her security and a life of freedom which Leo could give her..

Plus, I can't leave Jane, her father just got killed.. and even though there is just 1 enemy left out and if I wipe him out and get his nephew, I should be good.. for this guy didn't have a family and given my level of contacts and everything, this guy should be done with, over the next 2 days once they all leave.

I already have my plans and men and my police friends in place, we have been going through them over the last 2 week meticulously.. 

I was watching Soph secretly.. but she didn't know that.. I saw her more than thrice each week while I hid myself, I watched her have lunch and walk around in the grounds and today, I couldn't avoid her anymore and unfortunately she crashed into me.. and the minute I touched her bare back, all sorts of feelings and sensations were taking over me, so I rudely and brashly left again.. 

I don't mind if she hates me.. maybe its for the best.. 

She could move on.. with Leo.. who kept looking at her like she was his sun..

After greeting everyone, I decided to retire to the house for I didn't want to have a run in with Soph again and guess what? I find Soph right there at the entrance going inside whilst I was entering.. 

She was crying I could see.. she thought there was no one.. yes there were just security detail outside and inside everything was locked up. It had a code, so she stood there at the huge door whilst the tears were streaming down her face.

"Soph, you ok?" I asked her concerned.

She was surprised and she looked at me with a gasp. 

She turned away while I guided her inside and opened the security lock. It was her birthday combination.

She cried further looking at the passcode I punched in.. 

"What's wrong Soph? The wedding went well right? Liam seems happy.. Serena too" I trailed off..

She looked at me incredulously and started to go to her room.. I held her hand and looked at her..

"It will all be fine Soph.. your brother and Serena and everyone will be fine..tonight I am going to send you all with security back and I would be dealing with that guy with all my men and police..so you needn't worry anymore. You can go back to your life and freedom and everything.." I told her sincerely.

She just pulled her hand away and went into her room.. I saw that she didn't lock her door..

While I stood a few moments outside her door, I knocked gently and entered.. She was lying face down on the bed and sobbing..

I couldn't be rude or formal anymore.. I went to her and pulled her up from the bed and looked straight in her eyes and kissed her lips.. She slapped me hard on my cheek after pushing me away..

I deserved it.. 

I started to walk back.. shaking my head.. 

She pulled me back to her and kissed me hard,.. 

I couldn't control further when she was all vulnerable, I tried and I tried.. but this is Soph, this is probably the last time we even see each other.. 

I ended up responding to her and then I saw that she was undressing me.. "Soph" I called her name like I was being strangled.. 

"Let me have this one last time with you Alex.. if you wish that is.." she said and looked down..

"I was avoiding you for I knew this would happen. I am a mere human, Soph... but I can't do this to you.. I can't.." I told her firmly..

She didn't even look at me, she was looking at the floor and tears just kept streaming by.. I realised I was crying too this time..

I came to give her a last hug before I lost my mind and did something stupid..

I wiped her tears and said " Soph, take care.. you are always special to me.." 

"I am not.. I know.. Does it matter if I live or die? I am already dead Alex.. already dead.." Soph said and I saw her getting some pills and I was shocked to see she was trying to take the full bottle.. I went and stopped her and said "Soph, just stop it.. are you insane? are you trying to kill yourself when I am trying hard to keep you all safe.." I shouted at her..

"Does it matter when I am already dead on the inside Alex?" she smiled sadly and gave me the bottle and started undressing and I was really worried about her.. She was in a very vulnerable state and I couldn't leave her like this.. I saw that she was going in the bath tub. 

I decided to wait till she came out.. I waited for 5 mins and when I saw she wasn't coming out nor did I hear any water or shower sound, I barged in to see her drowning in tub water, I pulled her out immediately and covered her in towel and started to perform CPR, she spit out some water and I just couldn't hold myself back and cried and kissed her harder, despite being weak, she was responding slowly to me..

I ended up making love to her.. not once, but twice in a span of 2 hours and then left her on the bed while she was sleeping.. 

I wrote her a note and stuck it in her suitcase where she could only see.. if she opened that compartment and left her the night after tablets as we didn't use protection by her bedside with a note.. which was visible to everyone.. it only said "Don't forget, take these tablets for sure.." 

I tried having kids with Jane but stopped ever since I met Soph, I was clean.. I got checked and later, was so engrossed in work and chain of events, that I never was with Jane.. 

And then I kissed Soph on her forehead before I left and before anyone could find us and also, I had to leave for it was time for my plans to come into action and for it was time for Soph and her family to leave..

I love you Soph... always..  I muttered to myself and left..

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What do u think happens next???