Don't Wanna Love

25. Alessandro knows

Sophie

I knew some day, one day if he ever came, I had to tell him.. but did I want to?

But the twins deserve to know their father... So, I had to.. But I promised myself only if he ever came for me, would I tell him.. for he deserved to know them too..

But would they be safe? That was one of the main reasons.. I knew he has eliminated his enemies and everything seems peaceful now, but I don't want a life like this for my sons..

I want a happy and wonderful life where they get to make their own choices..

When I saw Alessandro here, I realised two things..

One, I still love him, I don't think I can ever not love him.. Two, he's still married and probably has his own kids I suppose, I didn't ask and didn't want to know. If he's happy, good.. for I am happy too.. with my boys.. yes occasionally I do feel alone, but then I call my brother or Serena and their boy would join us.. Dating was never on my plate for who was I kidding. I knew who I loved and wanted, and I didn't want to hurt any poor chap like I probably did with Leo. So, I just kept up the story that I had a partner who lived in the US and I visited occasionally.

After telling the HoD, I needed off today which she seemed to easily give for I hardly took leaves, I came out to see Alessandro having coffee and looking around the campus.

"Hey.. " I tried to get my voice out but it merely came out as a whisper.. What's with my voice and my stupid behaviour. I am a mother, of course, he's the father of my children, but I am old enough to act mature and not be stupid at this age.

Alessandro looked at me and smiled..

"So, what are your plans for today?" I asked him.

"Clearly, to see you and get to know why you are here of all places and what happened? to you.." he spoke openly.

"I see, shall we go to my place then for a bit of privacy? for this is a small town and I have to answer everyone's questions about you tomorrow.. that is.. only if you are comfortable.." I told him sincerely.

"Yes, sure." he responded nonchalantly.

So, guess I was the only one who seemed anxious and jerky when he's around.

It was disappointing, but I took a deep breath and calmed myself down while we took my car and went to my place which was quite close.

The cook and nanny would be out and about and no one would be there at home.

So, it could be a safe place to talk I suppose..

I got him home, asked him to sit and I sat right opposite to him. His gaze was all around the walls as the walls held the pictures of my precious boys with me..

"Are they yours?" he asked gently.

"Yes.."

"So, happy for you Soph" he stood up and walked closer to the pictures to inspect them.

My heart was thudding for one of them looked exactly like him while other was a mix of him and me, looks wise. "So, where's you husband" he asked while still inspecting the pictures.

I didn't answer and was instead looking at a random point on the floor as if it were the most interesting thing.

"Soph.."

"He's not in the picture.." I trailed off..

"Soph... I can see that.. wait.. how old are they?" he asked me while inspecting the pictures further.. and then suddenly looked at me.. straight in the eye.

"Are they mine Soph, don't you dare lie to me? You didn't take those tablets I left you right? Is this why you were hiding here? From me? " his voice cracked at the end..

I took a deep breath " Yes, they are yours, Alessandro.. You didn't want to do anything with me and I can't come to you and destroy your marriage with Jane, just when things were falling into place. I didn't feel that way for Leo.. Love happened just once with me Alex.. and I honestly didn't really think I could even get pregnant with just that day. Plus I was emotional so I just ignored those tablets and went home.. broke up with Leo and decided to move far away for my sanity.. It was when I was doing my research work in Australia I got to know.. I was pregnant with the twins.. "

"So, I had them there and then decided to move somewhere new and a bit closer.. and while I was in this town, I loved it.. I am happy here.. The twins are happy here.. " I broke down..

"I need some time to process this information.. I will see you later.." saying he stormed out of my home.. without even looking back..

I called my brother Liam and explained to him the whole situation and he asked me to relax and asked if he should come here, but I refused and asked him to just talk to Alessandro once..

I then composed myself and then went out to the cafe to get my lunch and there I saw Alessandro sitting by himself having a whisky all by himself.

I ignored him and got my lunch and decided it would be a take away and started walking back home, suddenly someone held my wrist and I turned to look back to see Alessandro.

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