Fallen

7. Feel

Harper got home and suddenly felt some sort of longing motivation, motivation to consider herself bisexual.

"Papa? Dad?" Harper called.

"Yeah, sweetie?" Nick called from the kitchen as he made dinner. Harper walked to him.

"I know this is a weird question..but what's it like? To be bisexual?"

"Oh. Well.." Nick started, surprised by the question.

"It can be hard at times. People always tell you to pick a side. If I date a guy, I'm just gay..If I were ever to date a girl they said I was straight and just lying. And.. Y'know obviously I love Charlie so it's not like I'm ever gonna date a girl.. But I still think girls are pretty? Not like-randos but.. Like celebrities, y'know?" Nick rambled. He had a habit of doing that.

"No, I understand, I get it.." Harper said, nodding.

"How'd you know you were bi?" She asked.

"Well I always thought I was straight, cause.. Well. Really I think it was a lot because everyone just told me I was. Like they were choosing for me. I remember once I was really obsessed with this boy when I was in year seven, but I thought I just really admired him. Anyway, when I met your dad everything changed. He really helped me discover my sexuality, especially since he knew what it was like. I think it was really good that I had someone who was sort of going through the same things as me.. So.. Yeah." Nick said. Harper just listened, letting all his words and advice soak into her mind.

"Okay.. Thank you." Harper said, slowly losing the motivation she had earlier. She was started to overthink.

I'm not bi because I think a few girls are pretty.

I just want attention.

I just want to be different.

I just want to be like my dads.

I want to understand my dads.

I'm straight.

I'm bisexual, actually.

I'm straight.

Harper's thoughts kept eating at her mind, she was so distracted she missed Nick's question until he tapped her.

"Harp? Did you hear me?" He asked gently.

"Um- no, sorry, what did you say?" Harper mumbled.

"I asked if there was a reason you asked me, if you're feeling those things.." Nick said.

"Oh. N-no, I'm not. I was just curious.." Harper said.

"It's okay to be bisexual.." Nick shrugged.

"I know." Harper said.

"Yeah?" Nick said.

"Yeah." Harper nodded.

"I don't know what I am." Harper mumbled.

"That's okay.." Nick shrugged. "You don't always have to have it figured out. You can just- love and feel."

"Is this about someone you know?" Nick questioned.

Harper shook her head, lying.
"No, I was just wondering. What's for dinner?" She asked, trying to change the subject.

"Oh, just basic fish and chips.. Your dad wanted this." Nick mumbled, blinking his eyes twice.

Harper nodded. "Something wrong?"

"No. Nothing you need to worry about." Nick smiled softly.

After a bit, dinner was ready. Harper was already sat down.

Ossy then came running down the stairs for dinner, and he sat across from Nick, and Charlie sat across from Harper.

The family ate in mostly silence, though Nick tried to start conversation a few times. Charlie wasn't having it. He was pushing his food around his plate.