Fallen

33. Happy Birthday To Me

TRIGGER WARNING: mentions of self harm.

When Ivy arrived home from the Halloween party, she went to bed with no hesitation; all she could think about was all that happened that day. Besides kissing Harper, it was definitely not her best birthday, yet, miraculously, it wasn't her worst.

The day started out by Ivy getting woken up at 6am by the shrill sound of her father's voice.

"She doesn't deserve anything!" Was what Ivy could make out of the words. She wasn't surprised by this, since she rarely got gifts or even a happy birthday from her parents. Ivy got dressed in a black hoodie and black sweatpants. She looked over her outfit in the mirror and concluded that she looked like a black hole; perfect.

Ivy made her way downstairs, a sigh leaving her mouth as she saw her mother and father.

"Morning.." Ivy muttered, biting the inside of her cheek. The adults just stayed silent. Ivy wished her parents went to work, just so she could see them less, but her grandparents were too filthy rich, and they made sure Ben was well off. "No happy birthday?" Ivy asked.

"There's nothing happy about your birthday, is there?" Ben questioned, and Ivy shook her head in response.

"Don't even say you wish I was never born, I don't want to hear it anymore." Ivy snapped in a rude tone.

"Don't fucking yell at me." Ben sneered. Edith just walked out, not staying to defend her daughter.

"I was just-"

"You're so manipulative." Ben said, pointing his finger at Ivy.

"How?! I wasn't even-" Ivy tried to speak, but Ben wouldn't let her get a word out.

"All you care about is yourself! 'Ohhh my birthday! It's all about me!'" Ben mocked in a high pitched voice.

"But-"

"I'm so sick of the bullshit! All this being depressed shit, just be happy! I literally don't know what more you could want! You have clothes, food, literally everything you want! And you're so ungrateful!"

Ivy couldn't take it anymore, all the anger was just burning inside her, and it hurt. "I hate you!!" She screamed, regretting it the second it left her mouth, though not because it wasn't true, but because she knew she'd be getting a slap on the face.

"Yeah? Well guess what, Ivy? I fucking hate you too." Ben growled, shoving Ivy away as he stormed to his room.

Ivy stumbled to the floor, embarrassed she fell because her father pushed her. She stood up and went outside, needing to escape. As she walked, the cold air blew into her face, making her nose run and her eyes water. She felt a drop of liquid roll down her cheek; a tear. Ivy hated crying. She absolutely despised it. It made her feel weak; pathetic..But she hadn't cried in so long, so just one or two tears would be fine, right? It was one or two tears, until Ivy was crying a whole ass waterfall. She allowed herself to sob for no longer than a minute, before she started to tug on her sleeves and scratched her exposed skin in a way to punish herself for weeping like a baby. Ivy did a loop around the neighborhood, walking back into the house. She went to her room, grabbing a safety pin. She wanted to cut herself so desperately, yet she refrained solely because of Harper. She would be seeing Harper tonight, and if something went wrong and Harper saw the cuts..Ivy wouldn't be able to bear the sight of the girl's face, and she certainly couldn't answer any questions; she wasn't ready to talk about it yet, but she didn't know if she ever would be. What if Harper thought about her differently? She was so perfect and Ivy was so flawed, it was a miracle Harper liked her.

Ivy spent most of the day just sulking in her bed, until she went to get ready for the Halloween party. She decided to dress up as the thing her dad thought she was; a devil. Might as well embrace it, Ivy thought. An hour later, Ivy was dressed and ready, but she didn't have a ride, and she had a feeling her dad would say no. Ivy slowly crept downstairs.